Falling is a Bad Habit
by RegalChromaggia69
Summary: Why? Why can't she stop... falling? And Nathan, so mean and cruel making fun of her like that... his daughter's just like him... Warning: Crackfic
1. Uncoordinated

****I was kinda inspired to do a funny thing with Repo!. The title of another fic inspired me more to make something like this. So, here it is! Pardon me for being a little tight with things, I'm not use to writing funny things that involve me kind of writing in it. I tried and I hope you enjoy. Smiley face****

Mag opened the door to the limousine she had drive her to the Wallace residence. As she took her second leg out of the vehicle she tripped and stumbled over to the gate, clutching it with dear life. "Dear God, I think I just found religion." She let go of the spiked gate and pressed the button on the receiver. "Shilo, is your name Shilo? Can I talk to you?" The gate started to slowly creak open almost making Mag's ears bleed. She started to walk through the gate, "Can you come down please, so we can speak? I saw you at the show. I thought I'd seen a ghost." She lowered the hood to her cloak, revealing her dark brown hair and bright blue mechanical eyes. "Your resemblance is striking. You have your mother's eyes, her hair. I was told you died with her. All these years have come and gone. How do I put this?" She hesitated for but a second. "I'm your, god mom." She saw Shilo gasp through the windows in the door. Mag glowed inside. She proceeded to the door, nearly tripping on the first step.

"State your business." Shilo said wearily. "Business?" What business is there, she just told Shilo she was her god mom, what more did the girl want? "What do you want?" Mag let out an irritated sigh. "I want, I want to finally meet you. Something real to cling to, leave you with the hope that you will go do all you're meant to, all I've failed to. In you is a world of promise. We have both been kept in bondage. But you can learn from all my failures." Mag put her hands up by her mouth to emphasize being kept in bondage. She hoped that this would satisfy Shilo's need to know what Mag wanted. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers." Is this girl stupid or something? "Or let them through the gate?" Mag teased. She wasn't even a stranger to Shilo, she was her frickin' god mom for god's sake! "That either. A big risk." Shilo continued from the stairs she was standing on. "A big fence." "A mistake." "A new friend." Mag looked through her memories for the last recording she had of Marni singing. "Perfect one." She muttered under her breath and let the hologram play. "Chase the morning! Yield for nothing!" Mag raised her arms in the air like she was trying to balance. Shilo quickly ran and opened the door and flew back up to her spot."Oh my god, mom?" Mag heard Shilo whisper. Mag walked in the door but fell short** (I went there) **after she tripped over the door frame. "Oh shi-" **(yes, she was about to say 'shit' Maybe later ill add it for laughs since she doesn't seem to be the type of person to curse)** Was all Mag got to say before her face met the floor. The hologram stopped and so did the singing. "Chase the morni-"

Shilo tried to stifle a laugh but failed and fell to her knees. "That was the second time!" Mag growled to herself as she hoisted herself up off of the floor. "And what are you laughing at, young lady?" Mag put her hands on her hips and watched as Shilo picked herself up off the floor and returned to her spot. "How'd you do that?" She asked, tears coming out of the corner of her eyes from laughing so hard. "I tripped, didn't you see me?" Mag gestured toward the door. "No, that, that eye thing." "These eyes can do more than see." Mag answered. "They're magical I guess. I've never really experimented with them greatly. Only to watch Nathan-" She cut off when she saw the shocked expression on Shilo's face. "I mean- er…" "I know, I mean, I've seen you sing before from my window." Shilo said shaking off what Mag just said. "I can see the world from there. Name the stars and constellations. Count the cars and watch the seasons." Shilo continued. Mag gave a very disturbingly creepy smile. **(Hey, it looks a little pedophilic to me; my heart still goes out to her though! *kisses*)** "I wish we could have watched together." "I can't have guests." Shilo blurted, completely freaked by Mag's expression. **(I would be too) **"Never?" "Ever. If dad found out that I'd been let out or you've been let in…" She trailed off and looked away. "I should go then, before I do promise me you won't," "Better that you don't. Forget me." Shilo started to walk back up the stairs. "Best if I resume my life inside my bedroom." Mag shook her head. She walked forward and tripped-but didn't fall-**I know you were looking for another fall, well picture this, her hands brushed the higher stairs, so she almost fell) **"Dammit!" She kicked the step and fell on her butt. **(I will annoy you with random notes like this, but, she lost her balance, no?) **Shilo laughed again and went to help her godmother up.

"Are you just that clumsy?"**("yes") ** Shilo said, extending a hand out for Mag to grab. "A sheltered rose needs a little room to bloom outside her bedroom." Mag continued, nonchalantly as Shilo pulled her up. She repositioned herself and brushed off some dirt. She cleared her throat then played the hologram memory of Marni again. "Chase the morning! Yield for nothing!" Shilo stared in awe. Mag turned off the hologram. "Let your life be your dream. Integrity. Honesty. It's too late for me. Don't look back till you're free to chase the morning." She held her arms up again and tried to let the memory play through her eyes. It didn't work. She tried over and over straining her eyes almost enough to pop them out of their sockets. **(Because if she **_**did**_** pop them out, well, that'd be freaky and unrealistic unless they were glass) **"So now you decide not to work!" She yelled. Shilo laughed once again. "Some eyes you have." Mag scoffed. "I would beat them if they weren't in my sockets, bloody things." "Woah, you're British?"**(Because she soooo couldn't tell by Mag's voice) ** Mag looked at Shilo with an offended expression. "Uh, yeah." Shilo laughed until she saw a figure coming from behind Mag. She ducked behind the second flight of stairs. **(Like in the movie) **Mag turned around.

There, standing in front of her, was the man she knew most of her life. Nathan Wallace, a _very_ old looking version of Nathan Wallace, but nonetheless, it was him. "Mag, how did you get in here?" She smacked him. "Hey, I'm supposed to speak first." **(Lol, hells yeah) **Nathan rolled his eyes and gestured with his hands for her to proceed. "HI, Nathan." Mag said slyly. "You shouldn't be in here, Mag." He took a step forward but tripped on his pant leg and toppled over on Mag. "Dang it Nathan Wallace! I've fallen enough times today!" **(But you know she liked it :D)** Shilo walked back down the stairs with a new confidence. She got one look of her father on Mag and decided it was enough and ran back up the stairs. "Shilo!" Nathan crawled off of Mag. Shilo came back down the stairs, now relieved.

"I tripped, okay?" Nathan said, shaking the dirt off of his shirt. **(*coughs* Suuuuuuure) **Mag coughed to get the attention on her. "Oh, sorry." Nathan extended a hand and Mag grabbed it. "Eh-hem, now, you may leave." Mag pouted and Shilo's eyes widened. "No, dad, she will DIE!" **(Now I have this little voice that the whole "You will die" thing. If you haven't heard it, look it up!) **Nathan swung around and looked at his daughter. "You were planning on killing her?" Shilo laughed, but then got a serious face. **(I haz serious face (-_-)) **"The Repo man will strike and she'll pay for that surgery, surgery." **(Nice way to be subtle, Shilo.)** "Oh yeah, she's right. But now I don't want to 'retire' : (" **(Was that frowny face inappropriate?) ** Shilo nodded and grabbed Mag's arm protectively. "Let her stay!" Mag's eyes flickered involuntarily and a hologram of Nathan bathing was playing. **(She waz spying on him while he was showering…or was she?)** You should have seen the look on Nathan's face when he saw it. It. Was. Priceless. His mouth was gaped open and his head was cocked to the side. His eyebrows were lowered and his eyes were ever so slightly slit**. (Sorry about the vague description, but the face in my head was just too… priceless to write in words. I hope you get a funny face out of that one too and make yourself laugh)** Mag ripped herself from Shilo's grip and blinked her eyes rapidly, desperate to get rid of the image. It didn't work… again. "Dang it! Go. A. Wa-" Then the image switched to Nathan walking out of the house and over to Mag's… **(I wonder what he was doing…?)**

Nathan and Mag both turned white as rated R images played. **(LOL idk you can probably guess).** Mag covered Shilo's eyes. "Mag, turn it off! Turn it off!" Nathan yelled into Mag's ear. "I-I can't, I don't know how." Nathan sighed and took his jacket off flinging it on Mag's head. The images disappeared. Shilo moved away from Mag's hand and looked at the two. Nathan's expression was stunned and ashamed at the same time while Mag's face was covered with Nathan's jacket. "Dad… is there something you aren't telling me?" Nathan looked at his daughter and then quickly pointed a finger to Mag. "She made me do it." **(Ah, a typical 40-year-old-kid-male-thing idk) **"I did _not_ make you do anything Nathan!" She said accusingly. She ripped the jacket off of her head and threw it at Nathan. The hologram was over. "Alright, sorry, Mag. Shilo, we have been seeing each other for, uh…" He scratched his head stupidly. Shilo's eyes widened. "Oh. My. God. And you never told me she was my god mother?" "Likewise." Mag added, glaring at Nathan. Nathan flinched like he was being threatened by a box of knives.

Mag sighed and twirled around to walk out the door. "Call me when the tension breaks." She started to walk out the door. She carefully lifted her foot over the ledge on the floor through the door. But failed when her other foot dragged and she, once again, fell. "Are you shitting me?" She screamed as she still lay on the ground. Nathan and Shilo both laughed as Mag tried to get up. She accidently stepped on the bottom of her cloak **(I don't know how long it was…)** and fell down again. "I tell you I'll probably have a lot of bruises when I'm finished with this night." Nathan wiped the tears from his eyes and went out to help Mag up. "Alright, before you hurt yourself more." He extended his arm offering Mag a help up. She reached out her arm and he grabbed it, pulling her up slightly before letting go. "Nathan!" Mag whined as her butt hit the cement on the stairs. **(Again, I'm unsure of something. I'm not sure if the stairs are cement or wood or whatever.) **She gave a death glare at Nathan and got up herself with the help of a railing. Still glaring at Nathan, she walked by and pushed him before she entered the house again. He put his leg back to catch himself from falling back. "Feisty!" He whispered before entering his home and closing the doors behind him.

Shilo was on the floor in a fit of laughs. "Alright, Snuggle Bunnykins,"**(It was a random name that came to me while I was typing it, okay? Anyways, its-heheh-a cute lil nickname)** Nathan said when he grabbed Mag by the arm. She turned to see a mischievous face staring back at her. "You're not supposed to call me that in front of people." She huffed under her breath. Shilo giggled again after she heard the pet name. She just couldn't contain herself. Mag glared at Shilo, but Shilo didn't seem to notice it. "Okay, _Baby Cutiekinns._" She retorted. **(Okay, I was stuck on this one, I'm admitting. I just wrote some random stuff.) **Nathan released Mag from his grip, "Dang it Mag." She smirked. "Shall I leave now and come back soon?" She planted a kiss on his lips and re-opened the door. "See you later, Nate. Goodbye, Shilo…" She eyes the young girl who was still laughing in a ball on the floor. "Shi, you should get up to your room before you pass out." Shilo apparently didn't hear him and continued. Mag let out a chuckled and walked out the door, closing it behind her.

Nathan sighed and tried to pick Shilo up off the floor. "Okay, Shi, I think you had your laugh for the night. Now pull yourself together." She grabbed his shirt and yanked him down on the floor next to her. "I think you need a laugh too, dad. You haven't smiled in so long-" She cut off and looked away, embarrassed. He did the same. **(Remember the holograms? Yeah…) **He started to chuckle until it turned into a full fit if laughter. Shilo joined him. "DAMN IT YOU SONOFA BITCH!" Both Nathan nad Shilo stopped ;aughing and looked at the door. It was Mag's voice that was shouting angerly. Nathan jumped up of the floor, painfully mind you, and opened the door to find Mag clutching the fence for dear life. **(…again)** "Mag, what the hell are you doing?" She blushed when she saw Nathan nearing her. "I- uh, tripped again." She was holding onto the fence so hard her knuckles were turning white. "I think I just pissed myself." She said calmly, her big eyes widened in fear. "I'd be scared too if I tripped near that fence." He grabbed Mag's waist gently and she let go of the fence while he pulled her away. She quickly turned around and clung onto him, her arms wrapped around his abdomen. "Oh Nathan, this world is just dangerous." He kissed the top of her head. "You can stay the night tonight and skip that damn Opera." She grinned wildly and kissed his cheek.

**Okay, so here it is. I am finished… for now. If you want me to continue and either making it funny or serious, just review. Oh, and please tell me what you think. :D Thank you, have a jolly good day! LOL**


	2. COFFEE

Mag walked into the house after Nathan and shut the door behind her. Shilo had finally calmed down and was now sitting on the steps, holding her head.

"What's wrong, Shi?" Nathan asked slyly.

"My head hurts now."

"That's what you get for laughing so much." Nathan teased.

A soft dinging went off from the kitchen and the smell of coffee wafted into the foyer. Mag's eyes widened and she gave a small smile while creepily muttering "Coffee." Under her breath. **(Oh yes, it's coffee time.)**

Nathan turned around to look at Mag, "What did you say, dear?"

"COFFEE!" She screamed into his ear after he leaned in. He jumped back in surprise holding the side of his head.

"Jesus, Mag, love coffee? I think you just made my ear bleed."

Her smile widened showing her teeth. She threw her hands in the air and starting to jump around. All the while shouting, "Coffee! Coffee! Coffee!" **(Much like I do when the coffee's done)**

Shilo looked at her with one eye squinted, **(Like this, kinda (-_o) lol whatever)** "Have a coffee fetish, do we?"

Mag nodded her head vigorously before jumping to the kitchen.

"Nice pickings dad." Shilo said sarcastically.

"At least it's not an obsession with…" He choked, "Feet."

Shilo shuddered as she remembered the one woman that her father had dated before. "The Shrimper…" **(Shrimper- a person who loves feet. Called Shrimper because toes are like shrimp and yeah… got it from Hot in Cleveland) **

"Don't ever mention that…. _Ever_."

Mag came running back into the room with a giant cup of coffee in her hand. Nathan slowed her down and tried to grab the cup, "Before you burn yourself…" **(And it **_**really **_**hurts when hot coffee spills on you *coughs* I shuld know)**

"Woah woah woah woah woah…" She said, pulling the cup away from where his hands were headed. "Don't touch my coffee unless you want to die." **(Much like me and my coffee)**

"You are a coffeeholic aren't you?" Nathan said jokingly.

"GO COFFEEHOLICS!" Mag shouted as she raised her cup in the air. **(Yeah, what she said! O.o COFFEE!)**

Shilo had disappeared, probably scared of Mag and her coffee addiction. Nathan sighed, "Smart girl." **(Yeah, I'd want to stay away from me too once I had enough cups *insert trollface*)**

Mag spotted something across the room and walked over to a small vase she had, but before she could reach her destination, she tripped on the rug. Her coffee went flying forward out of the cup while the cup flew out of her hand and landed a few feet in front of her face which was planted into the ground. **(And there's the fall!)**

"Oo, faceplant into the ground. Ten points for MAG!" Nathan shouted while holding up a sign with a ten scrawled on it. **(Wait… where did you get that Nathan? Should I want to know? "Not really…" I'm not gonna ask anymore, you're kinda scary, Nate. O.o) **

Mag sat up on her butt and looked at Nathan with puppy dog eyes. She was on the brink of tears. "Mag, I'm sorry, please don't cry." **(*Cue dramatic music*)**

Mag looked over at her spilled coffee, "Coffee, my coffee…"

Nathan sighed, "I'll get you more." **(Consider yourself saved since you helped someone who is coffee deprived)**

Mag's face lit up at the mention of more coffee. Nathan quickly left the room while Mag got to her feet.

"Here is your coffee!" Nathan said while handing Mag a cup, bigger than the one before, to her.

"Coffee…" She murmured before she took a drink.

A couple hours later Mag was shaking while she jumped up and down. She was hyped up on coffee. **(Naturally) **"Have you ever drank this much coffee Nathan? Mmm, coffee is god sent it's the best thing in the woooooooooorld!" She babbled. Nathan could barely understand her.

"I don't think I want to drink seven or eight cups of coffee, Mag." **(There's something wrong with that?) **Mag rolled her eyes at Nathan's comment.

Mag suddenly stopped. "Where's the bathroom?"

"Just down the hall, are you feeling alright?"

"No time to talk, I must get to bathroom!" She ran past Shilo, almost knocking the poor young girl down.

"Where's she off to in such a hurry?"

"The bathroom."

About ten minutes later…

"God, how long has she been in there? We should check on her in case she passed out."**(Doubtful)** Shilo said, slightly worried for her god mother.

They both walked down the hall and knocked on the door. "What?" Came an impatient reply from the other side.

"Oh, good, so you're just fine." Nathan gave a sigh of relief.

They heard the toilet flush and water run from the sink. A minute later Mag opened the door and walked out. "Babe, the coffee moves fast. If you were constipated before I bet you wouldn't have to worry about it." She started to walk down the hall, "And when I say I have to go to the bathroom after drinking coffee move out of my way and don't be in the bathroom." **(True that)** "There's one way to clean out your colons." She pointed out skipping down the hall.

Shilo and Nathan looked at each other. "I'm not going in there for a while. I think my bladder can hold a little longer." Shilo said inching her way down the hall. **(Yeah… when she says it cleans out your colons she isn't kidding, Shilo. Wait… don't you have another bathroom? It's a HUGE house! "I'm being dramatic," Fine then, pee yourself.**

**A/N: **I know it was short but I wanted to get an awesome coffee chapter in here. It came to my mind the other night while I was drinking some coffee. Let's see if another idea pops into my head to make another! Goooooooooooood day! COFFEE!1!one!


	3. Soggy Boob Crumbs

**A/N: Alright, this one starts off from the previous, naturally. I got some of these ideas from a very- hilarious- night. **

Mag ran up the stairs and stopped on the first landing. "Alright, now, I've never tried this before and I always thought it would be fun to do." **(Oh, God, what is she thinking? And remember, she's still high off coffee!)**

Nathan looked up at her from the bottom of the stairs, "Mag, what are you going to do?"

Mag flung her right leg over the railing. She positioned herself upright, holding onto the piece of railing in front of her. "Okay, here it goes."

"Mag, get down from there!" Nathan yelled like he was punishing a small child. **(And we all know she acts like one.)**

Mag ignored him and let go making herself slide down the railing. "Whoo! This is fun!" **(You might wanna re-think that, Mag.) **She came flying down the railing, stopping at the post on the end with a hard thump. "Okay… not so fun." **(*coughs* Told ya so.)**She lowered her left foot to the ground and tried to bring her right one over the railing. She fell, of course. **(Of course)**

"Oh god!" Nathan ran over to Mag, helping her up off the floor. "Are you alright?" **(I don't think she is…)**

Mag groaned in pain, "My crotch is on fire." **(Ouch) **She walked stiffly away from the staircase.

"Well then, with that," He followed behind Mag. He poked her on the stomach, "Rape! lol" **(Lol)**

Mag looked at him like he was crazy, "What in the world…"

Nathan smiled like the Cheshire cat, "I raped you… with my finger… on your stomach…" **(…vigorously…kidding!)**

Mag quickly covered the spot where he had poked her, "I feel so invaded now." **(Lol, sooo invaded. I guess you could feel invaded if someone poked you…)**

Shilo walked down the hall and into the foyer looking at her father and Mag, "What's going on in here? Can't I just pee in peace?" **(No, no one can ever pee in peace… and it sucks)**

Mag limped stiffly over to where Shilo was standing, "Your father just raped me with his finger."

"On the stomach," Nathan added. **(Yes, bc it's so important to let her know it wasn't too serious. It sounds wrong no matter what you say!)**

Shilo stared at Mag, **(Like this: (-.O) lol don't judge, its hard making funny-like faces on here) **"So that's why you're walking like that?" **(So that's why you're walking like that. WTF=What. The. Fruitcake.)**

"No, she slid down the railing on the staircase because she thought it'd be fun."

"And I ended up burning myself in my private places… ouch…" **(Wow… private places now… wtf?)** Mag added, of course. **(Because Im sure Shilo wanted to hear about your 'problems')**

"What the hell goes on at night in this house?" Shilo flung her hands above her head. **(Apparently slide down railings and rape each other in the stomach! "God that's just wrong," I know Shilo, I know.)**

"Pretty much that," Nathan said, pointing at the staircase. **(Since when did you slide down the railing, Nathan? "Every night after Shilo goes to sleep, is that wrong?" What are you, five? *facepalm* Ugh, I didn't expect him to say that…)**

Mag smacked his finger, "And rape me with your stupid finger." **(lol that sounds so wrong)**

"Geez, Mag, break my finger much?" Nathan held his index finger with his left hand.

"I murdered your raping finger." She nonchalantly stated. **(Yes, because now there's such a thing called a raping finger and you can murder it)**

Nathan scoffed, "Well, I'll just use my other nine raping fingers."

"I'm hungry!" Mag exclaimed, patting her stomach. **(Totally random, I don't think she cares about the… *cough* other nine raping fingers… God, that sounds so wrong)**

"What do you want?" **(I want I want to finally meet you…)**

"What do you have?" Mag eyed Nathan. "Do you have cake or something sugary and sweet?" **(Yes, because that's all you need, more sugar)**

"I don't think you need any more sugar, your body's gonna go on a sugar overload. Hell, you're shaking!" Nathan said, placing a hand on Mag's arm. **(At least someone agrees with me... -_-)**

"Fine, do you have chips?" She shrugged Nathan's hand off of her arm.

"Yes." He pulled a bag of potato chips from his back, **(Or ass, but who the hell knows. He seems to like pulling random things out of nowhere… or somewhere… *shudders*)**

"Oh, it's-a perfect!" **(What are you, Pavi now?) **Mag shouted snatching the bag of **(ass) **chips out of his hands. "Om nom nom nom…" She voiced as she stuffed the chips hungrily into her mouth. "So nummy…" **(lol, that's all I have to say. Nom nom) **

Several crumbs fell down her bra as she kept piling the chips in her mouth. "Uh, Mag, looks like your breasts are hungry too." Nathan pointed out, looking at them. **(And I'm sure he'd like to eat them out of her bra. "Hell ya!" Nathan, get out of my bubble!)**

"My boobs need to eat too, how do you think they get bigger?" She said, patting them proudly. **(Yup, lol)**

"Well, I'm sure they're thirsty too." Nathan said grabbing a random bottle of water off the end table. **(At least it's not from his ass this time lol… ass chips… I had a little too much coffee my own self)**

"No, Nathan, don't even _think _about doing that." Mag said covering the open spot at the top of her dress.

Nathan ignored her, of course, and opened the bottle. He took a drink and looked at Mag. "What did you think I was going to do?"

Mag relaxed and continued to eat her chips. **(I wouldn't act so careless now if I were you)**

Nathan walked closer to Mag and dumped the water into her dress. Mag jumped and smacked him on the cheek. "Dammit Nathan!" **(lol who **_**didn't**_** see that coming?)**

"I figured I should water them since they already had the fertilizer!" Nathan chuckled. **(You just stepped into dangerous territory, man)**

Mag gave a deep growl from her throat then dug her hand in her bra. Heartbeats later she lifted out a handful of soggy chip crumbs and threw them at Nathan's face. **(Wait, how many crumbs are in there?)**

"Why did you just hit me with soggy boob crumbs?" **(Soggy boob crumbs, Nathan, really? Lol)** He said, wiping what stuck to his face, off.

"Why did you pour water down my dress?" She retorted.

"I was watering them." He simply said crossing his arms. **(Yes, he was watering them, got that, Mag?)**

Mag gave him a fake smile, "Oh course, Nate, I understand." She pushed him, "You should have poured it down south because I'm still on fire!" **(She's on fire down south, got that?) **She gave him a creepy smile, but not like the one she gave Shilo.

"I'll get you some ice…" Nathan said, weirded out. **(Who wouldn't be? I'm sure he'd be even more disturbed if he saw her pedo smile.) **

"Nah, I need to go. I'll drop by some other time, kay kay?" Mag patted a still disturbed Nathan on the shoulder and walked out the front door.

Shortly afterward he heard a scream. He flung the door open and saw Mag clinging onto the gate again. "Wow Mag, you love that gate, don't you?"

She laughed sarcastically and slowly stepped away from it, "I need to change myself." She got into the limo that mysteriously came out of nowhere. "Bye!"

Nathan shook his head and walked up the pathway to the house. "What the fug is wrong with her?" **(I don't know, Nathan, I don't know…)**

**A/N: I hope you liked it, lol. I already have an idea for the next one and hope I don't forget it and have a brain fart while I start to write. (God knows I've done that a couple times during the process of this story.) **


	4. This Is Halloween

**A/N: Okay- Halloween special. I had some ideas and this one may or may not be short, so, bear with me here. Chapter four **_**will **_**be up soon!**

Nathan sat at the bottom of the steps, candy bowl in hand, rocking back and forth waiting for the small children. They scared the living crap out of him- no not the costumes, the kids themselves. They were so forceful and wild, they wanted their candy and they made sure they'd get it. **(Aww, poor Nathan, I know how ya feel, I used to be one of them)**.

Nathan jumped as the doorbell rang, **(Wow…) **"First customer," He muttered before shakily opening the door. He found Mag standing on the other side. "Oh dear god, I thought it was going to be kids." He looked in the distance to see a group of kids walking towards his house, he grabbed Mag's arm and yanked her in.

"Damn Nathan, why do you have to be so rough?" She then smiled at him, "Bad boy…"

He shook his head, "No, I'm trying to save you. Those monsters are coming…"

"They're just kids in costumes, Nathan, _not_ real monsters." She pointed out matter-of-factly.

He let out a growl of irritation, "I know that!" Just then the door bell rang. Nathan jumped, threw the candy bowl in Mag's hands, and hid behind her, "Answer it!" **(Who in the hell gave you the job of being a Repo Man?)**

"You child," Mag sighed before she opened the door. **("I know, right" I know, left…)**

"Trick or treat!" The kids chimed as they held out their buckets.

"Nathan, how much am I supposed to give them?" She turned her head slightly, since he was still behind her, clinging on for dear life.

"Two pieces,"

"Okay," She dug her hand into the bowl and brought out two pieces, throwing it behind the kids, "Fetch, fight, grab, draw blood if you have to." She slammed the door shut and turned around. **(Wow, Mag… you're mean. "My candy *Pets candy bowl*" *Steps away slowly*) **"Now that wasn't so bad, was it?" Her facial expression dropped when she saw Nathan shaking violently, "What's wrong with you?"

"Two pieces each… Mag… they'll want more… th-they'll kill me."

"Oh, please, Nathan, I highly doubt that," She back-handed him, making the candy bowl drop.

"No, you don't understand, they're like vultures and dead things when it comes to candy!" **(Yes, vultures and dead things…) **He said, picking up the scattered pieces of candy.

"Whatever," Mag sighed and looked at Nathan's head, he was wearing plush horns. "What are you supposed to be?"

"Nothing really, I was going to be a Repo Man, since I have an outfit, but it would scare all the kids away." He said, standing up. "Who are you supposed to be, Blind Mag?" **(haha, I get it, she's herself!) **He asked, looking Mag up and down. "I swear you wear that cloak and those boots every time you come here." **(I bet she never leaves)**

"You should dress like a Repo Man so I can have more candy :D." **(No no, Mag, you don't need any sweets, we don't want you doing… well, whatever you do.)**

Nathan gasped, "My candy…" He said, hugging it.

"Eh, you should be the Repo Man!" Mag smiled, "I'd like to see the little kids run, screaming for their mommies to save them." **(Evil…)**

"Damn, Mag!" He pondered for a moment, "Okay!" He then handed Mag the candy bowl and danced out of the room.

She shrugged and grabbed a piece of candy. Unwrapping it, she opened the door as another kid knocked. "Trick or treat!" The small child chirped while holding out her candy bag.

Mag smiled sweetly, chocolate covering her teeth, and dug out two pieces of candy. **(Lol, chocolate covered teeth. Yum) **She gently put them in the girl's bag and closed the door. Letting out a sigh of relief, she grabbed a few more pieces, unwrapped them, and stuck them all in her mouth.

Just then, Nathan walked in wearing his Repo Man suit. Mag about pissed herself as she ran into the corner. **(Again, a corner… really?) **"I'm sworry I ate the chocwate!" She said, failing all the way. She huddled into a ball, candy bowl tight in her grip. "Pwease!" She begged, "I'm so sowwy! Pwease leave me awone! I won't do it again." **(Aww, it sounds so cute. Pwease… lol…) **She swallowed what she had in her mouth, chocolaty saliva running down her chin, "It was just so good!"

Nathan sighed and took off the helmet, "It's me you idiot!" **(I was just about to say that… naw, it'd be too mean and this was entertaining enough!)**

Mag laughed in relief and got up, "Thank god, I thought I was going to die!" Another knock sounded at the door. Nathan threw on the helmet and gestured for Mag to give him the bowl, "No, my candy!" She said, moving it away from him.

"Come on Mag, it's for the kids, not for you." She shook her head. Nathan shrugged and opened the door to find a small child dressed as a ghost and his mother. Mag was the only one in view, her eyes still wide with fear, **(And probably dilated from all that candy.) **

"Trick or treat!" The little boy hummed, his mother half-heartedly smiling like she didn't care to be there, **(Maybe it was his sister… I've seen that going on more than anything…)**

Just then, Nathan stepped out of the shadows where he had been lurking, **(…behind the door…), **scaring both of them, ""Trick or treat :D" He growled in his Repo Man voice. **(Lol, I like the little smiley… :D) **He wrapped his arms around Mag's waist while looking at the two terrified people standing in front of him. More kids- and older ones- came running up to the Wallace's house after they heard the screaming. **(Apparently they're attracted to the scary shi- stuff) **

Mag gave an irritated grow from her throat and stepped out of Nathan's grasp, throwing the candy bowl at him. "Bad. Bad Repo Man." **(Lol, Naughty Repo Man… her recordings… lol… naugh-ty)**

Nathan mentally shrugged and took a step towards her. The crowd watching looked on with anticipation as he grabbed her into a tight embrace. She chuckled quietly and tried to get out. She stopped smiling as Nathan held on tighter, taking out a random scalpel. **(…ass scalpel…?) **Her fear heightened as he drew the sharp object closer to her eyes. **(Nathan, do I have to slap you on the hand?)**

Mag stay frozen in her spot not wanting to get repossessed. Did Nathan lie to her? **(Yes.) **Was he the Repo Man that would repo her eyes? **(Yes.) **Did they even sell Repo Man costumes? **(No.) **"N-nathan…" She looked into his eyes, "Honey, please…"

Nathan winked at her, "Don't worry Maggie, I'm pretending." Mag smiled as he dropped the scalpel and pressed the helmet against her lips as a kiss. **(Eww… you know how much blood has probably been on that? "I don't care…")**

The crowd gasped in astonishment. Nathan let go of Mag and ran inside the house, leaving her to fall on her behind. She looked at the crowd in a dreamy haze, "Please leave, I hope you enjoyed the show." Everyone backed away and skipped merrily on their ways, Mag closing the door behind them. She hit the light switch for the porch and stood up. "Nathan?" **(He disappear-ed)**

Nathan came back out, now in his regular clothing, "Hey baby, did the trick or treaters do away?" His asked, staring at the door.

"Yes," Mag simply said.

Nathan let out a sigh of relief and picked up the candy bowl, "Nom the chocolate?" **(lol nom the chocolate…)**

"Yes we shall!" She ripped some of the candies from the floor, unwrapped them, and stuffed them in her mouth. "Om nom nom nom…" **(Nommin all the best chocolate in the world! Envious I am.)**

Nathan looked at Mag, chocolate covering the outside of her mouth and pretty much her whole face. **(Obsession with chocolate much? "Every woman needs it when that time comes." O.o)**

"I'm just leaving now…" Nathan said, slowly backing away from Mag.

She looked sadly at him, "Why?" **(Let me guess…)**

"You have this crazed look in your eye like… like if I would touch your chocolate you'd rip my body apart." He took another step back.

"Fine then, I'll just go sit in the limo and eat my chocolate." She bent down, picking up the rest of the candy and putting it into the bowl.

"That's my bowl!" Nathan complained as she opened the front door, ready to leave.

She turned around and glared at him. He let out a squeak and flung his hands up in surrender. "That's my boy, you learn quickly." She smiled and ran out the door. **(I'm not too sure about that…)**

Nathan sighed and closed the door. "But I still love her…" He reminded himself before he turned off all the lights and trekked up the stairs.

**A/N: Fin! Hoorah! I'm so sorry, the actual chapter four will be out soon. I **_**had **_**to do a Halloween special. Soon, I promise, I'm **_**almost **_**done with it. Kk?**


	5. A Corner

**A/N: And here we are for another chapter. I'm sorry it's been a while, I brain farted a lot and I've been writing more for Last Minute Change of Heart… woops, got a little ahead of myself there. Last time I was ahead on this. I'll see what I can muster up.**

**I DO NOT OWN REPO! EVEN THOUGH I WISH I DID! WE ALL DO!**

Mag crept up the stairs slowly and opened the front door to the Wallace residence. She looked around the foyer seeing if anyone was in there: nothing. **(What are you doing Mag- "Sh!")**

Nathan walked through the door and looked at Mag who was looking around. She spun around to be eye to eye with Nathan, "Hi Nathan."

"Mag, how did you get in here?" **(Not again…)**

"Through the front door dumbass," She replied. **(Nice one Mag, "Thanks :D")**

"No way…" Nathan said in disbelief. **(No way, what?)**

"What did you expect me to do, climb through the window?"

"You usually do!" **(When'd you do that? "Don't ask, just never ask questions…" Okay Mag… creepy)**

"Who cares?" She itched her hand. "Ugh, I'm so itchy!" She started to itch up her arm.

"What the…?" Nathan examined as Mag pulled up her dress to itch her stomach.

She stopped and looked at him, "Can't I itch in peace?" **(No, no one can ever itch in peace)**

"Ha, lol, I watch as you itch yourself!" **(Wow, Nate, just… just… What. The. Fruit-"That's annoying, now shuddup!" Ugh, GET OUT OF MY BUBBLE!)**

"You'll smile when you get your flu shot!" **(What the-)**

"What?" Nathan cocked his head to the side.

Mag gave her special pedo-smile and crept up slowly towards Nathan. **(Because that's not creepy at all…)**, then she extended her arms, "Aw… don't you want a hug." She said pitifully as Nathan darted into a corner. **(Yes, because your house isn't big enough to hide in… and a corner… really?)**

"Shun! Go away! Go away!" He crossed his arms in an "X" manner shouting wildly.

Mag stopped where she was, dropping her arms to her sides. She forced tears to well in her eyes and started to cry, "You don't like me…" She whined. **(Pft, he won't fall for that.)**

"Aww, poor baby, I didn't mean to upset you." Nathan said, non-sarcastically as he walked up and wrapped his arms around Mag. **(:O *Mag smiles evilly* *Backs away slowly*)**

"Alright, now that that is over," Mag ran out of Nathan's grip and up the stairs. **(Oh God, no, not again Mag… Remember last time? "Yeah, so? It was fun!") **"Join me?"

"You're going to do it again?" Nathan looked at her with a WTF face.

"Yeah, are you going to join me or not?" She patted the railing on the opposite side of the one she was by.

Nathan pondered for a moment, "Fine, fine…" **(Geezus Nate, don't encourage her! ) **He skipped up the stairs and stood next to Mag, "Okay, ready?"

She nodded and walked over to stand in her position. Mag lifted her leg over the railing and saddled up onto it, her hands in front of her-again. Nathan did the same. **(3, 2, 1, Thumps on the post and bust both of your balls! Lady balls- woops, wrong story…)**

Shilo suddenly appeared at the top of the steps, standing between them, "What are you doing?" **(Apparently going to set their crotches on fire…)**

"Having fun, is that a crime?" Nathan looked at his daughter, eyes slit.

"Well, for me, it actually is. Rotti barely lets me have fun." Mag looked at Nathan the same way, "Who the hell cares, lets ride this railing!" **(Let's ride this railing… okay… um… have fun with that… *Walks away for a few paragraphs*)**

They both let go and slid down the railing, Nathan held his hands in front of him to slow down before he hit the post. **(Smart Nate!) **Mag, on the other hand, flew down and ended her joy ride with a thump, for the second time. **(Idiot…). **She hopped off the railing and fell to the floor, "It burns! It burns!" She curled into a ball all the while holding herself.

"Who's the dumbass now?" Nathan snorted. **(High five Nate… "I'm too cool for you," …or not… "You're mean! D:" Aww, sorry Mag, but you **_**are**_** a dumbass for doing that.)**

"Okay… Sorry I came to see what you were doing…" Shilo interrupted before shooting up the stairs. **(You guys need to quit scaring poor little Shilo…)**

"How's your crotch?" Nathan squatted next to Mag's fetal position form. **(I just realized… that sounds kinda wrong…)**

"I should have worn my leather pants…" She squeaked in pain, "Can you get me that ice bag now?"

Nathan stood up- but didn't move, "Say the magic word," **(Oh god, really Nathan, **_**this**_**?)**

"Pain…" Mag clenched her teeth.

"That's not it." Nathan said in a sing-song-y voice.

"I'm not playing this game Nathan." Mag said, her face pressed against the floor.

"Wrong word-s," Nathan continued. **(You're annoying, Nathan, "I know :D")**

"Nathan, just get ME THE DAMN ICE PACK BEFORE I RIP YOUR FACE OFF!" **(Feisty one we have here)**

"Not the right wo-ord."

Mag rolled onto her back and flung her legs out, making Nathan fly back a few feet from where he was standing. **(Haha, lol) **"Can't you do one simple task without being annoying?" She got on all fours and stood up. "God, Nathan, I mean, seriously?"

"I think you broke something of mine…" Nathan groaned from where he was laying. **(Be a man, suck it up!)**

"Yeah, well I humiliated myself and got hurt… again." Mag complained.

"You think that's bad? I stuck my arm up a dead guy and used him as a puppet!" **(You trying to blow your cover?)**

Mag did a double take at Nathan, "Ew."

Nathan stood up and walked over to Mag, "Yeah, that's what I said when I was done." He stretched his back making several audible pops.

Mag flinched, "That sounds gross… and I'm still burning," She back-handed Nathan as hard as she could. He let out a squeak of surprised pain. **(Damn Mag. I love doing that to people.) **She gave out a grunt of satisfaction, "Where's that icepack and I'm not saying the magic word so forget it!"

Nathan sighed and walked out of the room, returning heart beats later with an icepack. "Here's your damn icepack, baby." He haphazardly chucked it across the room. **(You're so mean…)**

Mag turned around to see where it had landed, "Now go pick it up." She demanded, glaring at Nathan.

"Why should I?" He retorted. Mag gave him the Death Stare, **(You know, the one that makes small children weep and grown men cower in a corner… maybe her creepy smile would have worked the same…). **"Okay…" He literally ran to the icepack and up to Mag, gently setting it in her hands.

"Thank you." She turned around and fumbled with her dress.

"What are you…?" Nathan tried to peek around to see what she was doing.

Mag turned around, icepack gone. "That feels better." She sighed.

"Where'd it go?" **(I was wondering the same thing… I mean, she **_**is **_**wearing a dress…)**

"Don't ask, just, please…" She looked sheepishly away. **(I am scared of you two.) **She looked back at Nathan, then at the stairs, then Nathan again, "Tell me, how did you stop yourself from hitting the post since I was so drown in my joy from sliding down to not bother seeing what you were doing?"

"Watch and learn," He walked up the stairs and saddled onto the railing, Mag observing closely.

Just then, the front door swung open and Rotti Largo stood in the doorway. **(Oh yeah, I added him in here :}D lol mustache smiley)** "Guess who's he-re!"

Mag bolted up the steps and hid behind Nathan. She accidently pushed on him and he slid down the railing, not having enough time to catch himself. **(Nice going Mag…) **Everything ended with a loud thump and a teary eyed Nathan whom dropped to the ground just as Mag did. "Now who's the dumbass?" Mag retorted, laughing as hard as she could.

"What the hell are you people doing?" Rotti asked, his face twisted in confusion.

Nathan groaned in pain as a response and Mag kept laughing. "Let's see you do it." Nathan choked out. **(No no no… Mag hurts enough now… right? Mag? *Looks around in the empty room*)**

She smiled and flipped her right leg over the railing, "Okay, let's see if I can do it right." She took a deep breath and let go, flying down the railing. She panicked and put her hands on the railing in front of her but was too slow, therefore she crashed. **(I'm pretty sure Rotti's like WTF?)**

Rotti watched on as Mag crumpled to the floor again, taking the icepack out **(of somewhere) **and putting it on her hands. "What are you doing, idiots?" He asked again, watching the two of them lying on the floor in balls. **(Never ask questions… Aren't you just so proud of your Voice of GeneCo?)**

Mag sat up, "We were riding the railing." She replied nonchalantly. **(Yes.. okay… er… yeah I forgot what I was going to say) **She looked over at Nathan whom was curled up still hugging himself, "And idiot here was supposed to show me how to stop before I hit the post, but seems like he failed too."

Rotti still stared at her, "You, my dear, are a dumbass. Say it with me now: Dumb-" **(Ass)**

Mag rolled her eyes, "Okay, okay, so it's not the brightest idea to ride the railing. It's fun as hell though!" **(*facepalm*)**

Nathan, on the other hand, still lay on the floor, either scared or in pain… or both. He slightly turned to face Rotti, "It's only because she pushed me." He explained through clenched teeth.

"Oh come one, Nate, really? You're blaming me? I would do no such thing!" Mag had a look of innocence on her face while she smiled as sweetly as she could. **(Innocent? I highly doubt that!)**

"You chased me into a corner for God's sake!" He glared at her, now sitting up. **(Again, a corner… really?)**

"Lol really? Little Maggie couldn't hurt a fly!" Rotti jumped in, a wicked smile spread across his face. **(Couldn't hurt a fly… when I was spying- er- observing her, she killed a lot of flies. I need to bring her to my house to sick them… ew)**

"Yeah right! She can be scary when she wants to be… have you seen that eerie smile she gives off?" Nathan protested, he wasn't going to believe what Rotti says, he knows Mag and how she could be. **(Damn straight!) **Hell, she plans out the best tortures and murders. "Go on, show him!" **(Sweet… I would like to hear some of these murders and tortures she comes up with… but not this chapter just yet… "Oh, just wait and see *evil cackle*")**

Mag looked at Nathan and gave a smile, hey, someone asked her to give a creepy smile. "Okay… if you're sure." She turned to face Rotti who was looking at her with a puzzled expression. **(Brace yourselves!) **She tilted her head to the side and gave off the best pedo-smile anyone could pull. Rotti backed away slowly, Mag closing in.

He turned around and sprinted to a corner, "Leave me alone! Please!" He covered his face trying to block Mag out of his view. **(What's with you people and corners? Hell-o, there's a whole house to hide in!)**

Mag dropped her smile and looked at Rotti with puppy dog eyes, "You don't like me?" She sniffs as if she's about to cry. **(Let's see if **_**he'll**_** fall for this. Seems as if Nathan did…)**

Rotti didn't even pay any mind to her, he still covered his face with his hands. **(Coward. "Why don't you try it when she's coming after you!" *scoffs*)** Mag shrugged and walked away. Rotti took a deep breath before looking up, "Thank God…" He stood up and inched his way towards the door, "My God, you _are_ creepy!"

Mag proudly smiled, "Why thank you!" **(Lol, I take comments like that so lightly as well… but others don't…) **"I still burn… I mean the icepack helped, but wasn't on long enough…"

"What are you talking about?" Rotti looked at Mag.

"I slid down the railing before you came and I failed then, and well, yeah…" She turned around, the half melted icepack still in hand. With a few grunts she turned back around. **(Uh… that could be read wrongly… well... have fun with that! I leave some of these parts for you to imagine where she's putting that…)**

"Wh-where'd it go?" Rotti looked at Mag, kind of freaked out.

"Do you really want me to explain that?" **(I don't think anyone does… {lol I almost put 'dies'})**

Rotti shook his head and flew out the door. Nathan was still on the floor in a ball, this time in laughter. "Why do people keep asking me where I put the icepack?" Mag looked at Nathan. He shrugged and kept laughing.

**A/N: Will you ever find out where she puts that icepack? Do you even want to know? This one was the longest one I've ever done, but it was worth it since it's late. Eh, I know I stopped abruptly… the fifth one should start off of the and of this…? IDK I'm just as surprised as you are, I'm never truly sure what I'm going to write next.**


	6. Creepy Smile Contest

**A/N: Hello thar! How long has it been since the last update? Sorry, if it's been a while… I have a lot to juggle right now and I just finished a few chapters of my other story. I have some ideas for this chapter, so, enjoy! (And hope it makes up for the time)… Surprises await you!**

…..

"Okay, how do you feel about a creepy smile contest?" Nathan asked Mag while strolling up to her.

She looked at him, "I'm sorry, but, you beating me in a creepy smile contest, I highly doubt that'll happen." She scoffed, her arms crossed. **(I'm afraid I have to agree with her on this one.)**

"No, not me… I called Pavi, he'll be over shortly." He smiled his hands behind his back innocently.

"P-Pavi?" She looked at him like he was crazy, "What do you mean? When, where, ah!" **(Are you afraid of a little competition, Maggie dear? "No!")**

"Are you scared of him or something?" He asked, looking her up and down.

Mag shook her head, "No! It's just… his face… really isn't his face… and it's disgusting."

"I know, right?" Nathan vigorously nodded in agreement. **(Goddammit! I know, left! "What do you need, confirmation?" For the last time, Nathan, GET OUT OF MY BUBBLE OR I WILL SICK MAG ON YOUR ASS! "*Slowly backs away*" Yeah, I thought so….)**

"So, are you going to be the one person that does that one part in the contest… thingy?" Mag asked. **(Oh, yes, because that's so helpful….)**

Nathan tilted his head to the side, "What the hell did you just call me?"

Mag jumped when the doorbell rang and Pavi's thick Italian voice could be heard through the other side, "I'm-a here, bella. Who's-a ready for-a contest?"

She shook her head and hid behind Nathan, "Open the door." She whispered.

"No, you open it, chicken." **(Should you really call her a chicken? Who was the one that cowered in the corner?)**

Mag licked the back of Nathan's neck seductively, "Why don't you answer it, baby?" She batted her mechanical eyes at him. **(And I'm sure he'll fall for that one… I mean, literally because he did last time!)**

"No." He quickly said, taking a step back. (***Blanche's accent* Well, I'm stunned, just stunned. I don't know how to describe how stunned I am…)**

Mag growled and pushed Nathan towards the door. He opened it, with several protest, revealing Pavi, whose non-stop smile stretched wide across his face. "Hello there-a, bella. I'm ready!"**(lol, did you just call Nathan bella? I guess you could say he's beautiful… "It's-a none of your-a business!" Heheh… sure…) **He walked in and up to Mag.

Mag nodded and shooed Nathan away. "Okay," She started, looking at Nathan, "How are things going down?"

"Just stand there, stare at each other and give your best creepy smile until one of you backs down." He explained. **(I know I'd lose if I were up against both of them… *shivers*)**

Mag shrugged and turned to look at Pavi, whom was already giving off his smile. She tilted her head to the side, **(Brace yourself, Pavi…)**, and smiled one of her creepiest ones yet. **(Yes, even creepier than the one she gave Rotti… I mean… so… I don't know what to say…)**

They stay staring at each other, Nathan watching on in agonizing pain. **(Poor Nathan, living out his worst nightmare)**

Squinting one eye, Pavi drew in a deep breath. He exhaled and turned away from Mag, "I- I can't. She's-a too creepy!" He ran towards the door in a mean to escape, but stopped short after he literally ran into the door, falling back. **(LOL, fail…), **He got up as quickly as he could, this time opening the door before he sprinted outside.

Mag leaned over to look out the door, "I swear there's a dust trail behind him."

Nathan laughed, "Damn, he's more chicken than me." He walked over to the door and closed it. **(Oh, so now you admit that you're a chicken? "I admit nothing")**

She shook her head, "I don't know… I thought he was tougher than that." She chuckled, and then sighed, "Now what?"

"Do you have any new torture methods you want to talk about?"

Mag smiled evilly, "Of course!" **(Oh God… oh god… what have I gotten you guys into?)**

"What was your latest one?" Nathan asked, walking over to the staircase to sit down. She followed shortly after.

"Hmm…" She put a finger on her chin, "How about tying someone up by the arms and put pins throughout their body. And really big pins, like this…" She held out her arms to indicate the length. "After that, take off the ropes so that they are only held up by the pins. Then take a chainsaw and mutilate their body… no… make them suffer… just cut off one of their arms." **(Holy shit… I'm not gonna make Mag mad anytime soon…)**

Nathan flinched, "Oh god that sounds horrid. Tell me more." He smiled wickedly, setting his elbows on his knees and resting his head on his hands. **(I hope Shilo doesn't come downstairs… Also, I hope I don't speak too soon…)**

"Then take a razor and score along their flesh slowly." She took her nails and slightly pressed them against her arm, slowly moving upward. "You could do something with the blood that's splashing on the floor if you wish, but, personally, I would roll around in the blood and laugh wildly as the person continues to scream their ass off, but that's just me."Mag stopped and looked at Nathan whose mouth was open wide. "What?" **(What? WHAT! I'd be surprised if he **_**didn't**_** look like that after you were done talking! Poor Nathan…)**

He shook his head, "That would be totally awesome to do to someone you absolutely hate." He stated, in an unnerved voice. **(0.o)**

Mag shrugged and nodded her head, "And I'm not done yet. This idiot is still alive." **(God Mag! What the bloody hell is wrong with you?)** She shifted, letting her legs dangle down the stairs. "Also, you would have to shoot them in the legs and their good arm over and over. Yeah… and, uh… you have to cut them in half to make sure they're dead. And if they're still living, rip off their head. " **(I am now officially scared of you two…)**

"Mag, calm down there before you hurt yourself! I think this torture thing has gone a little too far with you… and please don't kill me!" Nathan shot up from where he was sitting and ran a few feet away from her. **(At least it's not a corner.)**

"What type of person do you take me for?" She got up and walked towards Nathan. He backed up farther, "Huh? What was that supposed to mean?" He shook his head, his hands held in front of him. **(Not the corner, not the corner!)**

She tilted her head to the side and puffed out her bottom lip, "Nathan?" He kept shaking his head. She reached out and touched his arm before he darted into the closest corner. **(WHY!) **"Wow, Nathan." She walked closer to him, **(What're you gonna do? "I want to screw with him… I got him where I want him." I'm stepping away from this bubble… {It almost sounded like she wanted to screw him… "I also want to do that…" eh…})**

Mag extended her arms and bent down, grabbing onto Nathan. He flailed wildly, hitting her in the face. She instantly released her grip and staggered backward while holding her nose. **(Oh shi- you're screwed Nathan!) **Nathan looked up, fear in his eyes, "Shit, Mag, I'm sorry!"

"Damn Nathan, you got a good hit on you." She removed her hand from her nose to look at it. She was greeted by a crimson liquid running down her palm, "Y-you made my nose bleed." **(Great Nathan… now she might **_**actually**_** kill you…)**

Nathan pressed himself closer into the corner. **(You know what, I'm gonna call that the Corner of Protection since it seems like everyone just **_**loves**_** running to hide in it.)** "Pl-please, Mag… I- I didn't mean to… I didn't mean to…" He began to cry while he held his knees closer to his chest, rocking back and forth. **(Damn, **_**and**_** she can make grown men cry. I just love her! Who agrees?)**

Mag shook her head, "Don't worry, I'm not coming near you Flaily McFlail Fail Pants!" **(What. The. Fuck.)** She backed up and dashed towards the other corner. **(Wait, what's the point of that?)**

Shilo, of course, walked into the room from… **(Where were you? "I'm not telling." Okay…), **"What are you guys doing?" She asked as she examined the two adults, each huddled in their own Protective Corner. "And why are you bleeding Mag?" She turned to face her father, "Dad, what did you do to her?" **(lol and the blame instantly goes to Nathan. I know half of it was his fault and I'm sure Mag didn't hit herself in the nose for fun…) **

"Wha? She- she tried to _attack_ me. As you see I'm in _this_ corner!" Nathan yelled in a form to defend himself. **(OMG! I didn't know you were in **_**that**_** corner)**

"So, that's why you're crying? Afraid of little Mag over there are we?" Shilo teased.

Nathan was still slightly curled in a ball, his face stained with tears, "If you heard what she was saying earlier, you would be!" He retorted, shivering at the thought. **(I have to agree with him on this one, Shilo…)**

"Why?" She tilted her head to the side, looking at her father who started to cry again. **(Wimp…)**

"She was talking about torturing people and _that_ was super scary. I mean… holy shit that goes flying across the room scary…" He murmured under his breath. **(Holy shit that goes flying across the room scary…? Wha… huh… I mean… I don't know what I mean!)**

Shilo shrugged and walked over to Mag, "How are you? Are you gonna bleed to death, because it looks like you've already started." She looked at Mag's face and her hands which were covered in blood.

"It won't stop!" She panicked, scratching at her face. "Make it stop! Make it stop!" **(Calm down lady, you just get out of prison?)**

Nathan stood up and ran over to Mag, "Honey, calm it. I'll get a wash cloth, and keep your head tilted back!"

"I thought it was forward…" She noted, plugging her nose. **(I still don't know… I mean they say tilt your head back then others say it's bad… fluckerdoodledoo, I'm confused)**

"Don't do that." He scolded, slapping her on her free hand, "Let me get the wash cloth. Stay put." He walked away.

"Grand!" Mag tilted her head back, "He's the doctor." **(Are you the nurse? "I was a few days ago, the doctor needed help with… something." Heh, I'm sure…)**

"Are you alright? Do you need anything?" Shilo looked down to see Mag smiling and moving her body in a dancing motion. **(Yeah, I think she needs a brain… or to be put in a mental institution.)** "Mag, what the hell are you doing?"

"I'm moving to my favorite song, is that a problem?" She continued on, ignoring the weird look Shilo gave her.

"Yes, it's a problem when NO ONE ELSE CAN HEAR ANYTHING!" **(Woah, chickie, calm your arse down.)**

"Shi, it's all in the head." **(What's in there? I don't think anyone is home in your head…)**

Shilo scoffed, "It makes you look _insane_!" She threw her hands in the air as Mag went back to her "dancing". Shilo walked away, insulting Mag under her breath. **(No. Bad. You can't insult Mag under your breath. "Thanks for defending me! I love you!" Oh, God… what have I done?)**

Nathan returned with two wash cloths. One damp and the other dry, "Here, put the dry one on until you stop blee-" He then looked at Mag whom was still doing whatever the hell she was doing. **(Yup… this is what I had to deal with while you were gone! "I'm sorry… it's what I have to deal with every time you end a chapter!" Flabbergastation)**

She stopped and looked up at him, "Okay, hand it over to me, please!" She reached her hands out, flexing her fingers for Nathan to put the dry washcloth into them.

"Here," Nathan shook off what had just happened. "Okay, then, what shall we do next?" **(You're asking her this? Oh god, who the hell knows what she'll come up with in that head of hers.)**

Mag shifted on the floor and gave a toothy grin, "Hm…. Let me think…" **(Oh dear God, she's thinking…)**. "How if we go outside to do something?"

"I don't think so." Nathan shook his head, handing Mag the wet wash cloth. "Wipe your face off, Bloody Maggie." **(Oh, I see what you did thar!)**

She grabbed the wash cloth and scrubbed it on her face, throwing it back at Nathan, "Thank you, now, how about… oh, oh, oh!" She jumped up from where she was, "Let's go jumping on the bed!"

"Jumping on the… bed?" He looked at her like she was crazy, **(And no one's saying she isn't…)**. "I suppose…"

Mag smiled and ran up the stairs towards Nathan's room. She neared the doorway, trying to stop herself from hitting the frame, but failed and fell backwards, landing in front of Nathan's feet. She looked up at him, "Hi, there," **(Repo Man: "Hi There!")**

He looked at her quizzically, "What the hell are you doing, Mag?" **(Trying to hurt herself again…)**

"Nuffin…" She sat up and looked at Nathan, "Would you mind helping a lady up off the floor?"

"Lady? I see no lady here." He laughed, looking around the hall playfully. **(Lol nice one Nate! "I thought so too!")**

"Well, then," She got up and looked Nathan in the eyes. Her body slowly leaned towards his, her lips puckered out.

Nathan took a step back, allowing Mag to fall to the ground, "What are you doing?" **(I think she was trying to suck your soul out through your lips by the looks of it.)**

"I was _trying_ to kiss you, dumbass. But apparently you don't want one, so, I'll go jump on your bed until I break it to the floor." She got up and ran into Nathan's bedroom, jumping onto the mattress.

"Mag, please don't break my bed!" He ran in after her. **(Maybe you should break it together… "*gasps* Naughty!")**

"Join me we can jump on it together!" Mag yelled, caught up in her fun. She jumped up and down, up and down, and yeah…

"Uh, are you wearing a bra?" Nathan asked as he examined her jumping form.

Mag stopped and covered her chest, "Shi-oot, I forgot to put one on…" She sheepishly sat on the bed and looked at Nathan whom was smiling at her. **(I'm sure he was enjoying that…)**

Nathan walked up to the bed and climbed up on top of her, making her fall back. "So, then…"

She smiled up at him, "So…" **(Wh-where are we headed?")**

He leaned down and pressed his lips hard against hers, then pulled away, "So that!"

She growled and pulled him down, "And this." **(And goodbye!)**

**A/N: YAY! That sums this chapter up! I'll get to working on the next one right away- I have an idea and it's for the upcoming winter. Where is she going with that? You might ask, well, just wait and see. So I am officially scared of them now… *twitches* YAY!**


	7. Ice and Cake

**A/N: And here we are for another chapter of Falling is a Bad Habit! I'm your host, Sarah-Celine! What the hell was that? Just ignore me and read on…**

…

"What's the matter?" Mag asked as Nathan sat on the steps and pouted. "What did I do wrong, sweetie?" She walked over to him and looked him in the eyes. **(Yeah, what **_**did**_** you do?)**

"Nothing," He sighed, shrugging Mag away from him.

"Oh my god, Nathan," Her eyes lit up as she jumped back a few inches, "Something's happening …" **(Is it some type of male menopausal thing, because I can leave… really…)**

He looked up at her, "It's my birthday." His voice was vacant and hollow.

"Is that a problem?" **(I guess at his age…)**

"Yes!" Nathan quickly stood up, startling Mag, "I don't have any cake!" He grabbed her arms and started to shake her, "I _need_ cake!" **(O.e Uh… okay…)**

She slapped him, "Calm down!" He stopped immediately, letting her reposition herself. Mag smiled. "I'll go get some," She said while taking Nathan's hands off her shoulders. She walked over to the door and opened it, to be greeted by a very chilly breeze.

"Be careful not to slip on the ice!" Nathan called out to her with a _glad that's not me_ voice.

She swung around and glared at him, "I won't!" **(Suuuure…)**

"Okay, then," He walked up to her and gestured for her to continue. "Have fun out there!"

She scoffed and turned back around, wrapping her arms around her body. Mag lifted one foot out of the house and placed it on the slippery ground in front of her. Her leg slid forward, making Mag grasp onto the side paneling of the house. "Oh my god! Oh my god! I'm falling! I'm gonna die! Nathan, help me, help me!" **(Wow… just, just wow….)**

"Mag, Mag dear, put your right foot inside the house." Nathan grabbed her arm.

She did as she was told and brought her leg back inside, "God, when did it get so icy out there?" Mag's eyes were widened in fear and her mouth was agape.

"Wow, Mag…" Nathan sniggered, "You're an idiot." **(Agreed)**

She took a deep breath, "I'm going back out, wish me luck…" She turned her back against Nathan and carefully placed her leg back outside. She then proceeded with her other one until she was completely outside. She turned around and looked at Nathan. "I did it!" She squeed happily. **(Congratulations let me give you the Golden Medal of Courageousness-ness… and Squeefullness, I felt it was necessary…) **

"Well, my luck is wished upon you." Nathan playfully bowed.

Mag turned back around and ran confidently across the porch. **(Why would you do such a thing?)** She suddenly slipped on the ice, her limbs flailing wildly about in front of her. Her legs flew up from under her and she landed on her back.

"Ten points!" Nathan walked out onto the porch and stood in front of Mag. He held a piece of paper with a ten scrawled on it. **(Wait… is that the same one from last time? "**_**Maybe**_**…" Now you just brought back the whole ass chips… great -_-)**

Mag looked up at Nathan, growling, and flipped him off. She then rolled onto her stomach and brought her knees up to stand on them. Her hands, though, slipped in out in front of her and her chin hit hard on the cement. **(Ow…)**

Nathan suppressed a laugh and walked back inside, closing the door behind him. "Have fun and good luck!" He shouted through the door. He wasn't going to risk getting hurt by her again.

Mag growled again and stood up, this time not falling. She slowly walked over to the railing and gripped it tightly, holding on to it as she traveled down the stairs. "You know what?" She asked herself while looking at the large slap of icy cement in front of her, "I'll just skate my way to the limo!" **(I-is that a good idea? "Hell yesh!" Of course **_**you **_**think so!) **She put one foot in front of her and slid her other forward, sliding down the sidewalk.

She fell forward when she hit a patch of dry cement, but luckily ran into the limo in front of her. Her face pressed against the window while her hands were gripping the top of the vehicle. **(Oh! I could just imagine that…) **Mag pulled herself up and opened the door, quickly jumping in.

Back inside the house, Nathan paced back and forth, laughing to himself. "I can't believe Mag is such an idiot! I mean, come on, who would go back outside after they nearly broke themselves the first time?" **(I can't believe you're talking to yourself…)** He stopped in front of the door and watched Mag do a face plant into the limo's window. "Idiot…" He huffed under his breath before turning around to walk up the stairs.

As he reached the top, he smiled maliciously when he saw his daughter's bedroom door wide open. He skipped over to the entrance of the door, "Hello, dear." **(Nathan, what do you have going on in that tiny mind of yours?)**

Shilo looked up at him from her position at her desk, "Hello dad?" She eyed him suspiciously.

"So, whatcha doin?" He rocked back and forth on his feet, looking around her room.

"Nothing really, I was planning on getting something to drink though…" Shilo then got up and started to walk towards the door.

Nathan jumped back, grabbing the door handle, and closed it quickly. He fumbled around in his pocket for the key and locked the door. "Try to get through that!" **(Nathan! *Slaps on hand* BAD! "I feel that was unnecessary.")**

She banged on her door while shouting at her dad to open it. Shilo gave up, realizing she had her bobby pin and turned around to the place where she had it. "Dad?" She looked at the piece of wood that blocked them, "Did you take-"

"Yes, so you can't get out." He laughed, walking away. **(What the hell? You're so mean!) **He traveled back down the stairs, this time turning to the kitchen. **(What are you doing?) **He walked up to the freezer and opened it, revealing buckets of ice cream. "We need some ice cream to tame the sweetness of the cake." Nathan smiled and he pulled out a bucket of chocolate chip ice cream. **(OMG Nathan, make sure it goes with the cake. I'm sure you wouldn't want to pick the wrong flavor out of the thousand you have in there!)**

He sat it on the counter and opened the drawer underneath it, taking out two spoons. "Mag and I are gonna have some fun with this :D" **(Oh, I'm sure…)**

Now, let's travel back outside where Mag is almost to the door. "Okay, steady now…" She encouraged herself, putting the cake on the steps next to her. She carefully walked up them, gripping on the railing the whole way. **(I have an odd feeling that this isn't going to end well…) **She turned around and picked up the cake then headed back towards the door.

Nathan hurried to stand in front of the door, watching Mag through the glass. She was now fumbling with the large box in her hands, trying to waddle towards the door. "Idiot…" He whispered under his breath as she neared the door. He backed away as she came closer at an alarming speed. **(Oh no…)**

Mag stumbled forward, slipping on the ice. She slammed into the door, leaving a loud thump and her face pressed against the glass that separated her from Nathan whom was laughing wildly inside. She growled at him and carefully removed her face from the window. "Open the door!"

Nathan shook his head, "No, you're going to kill me!"

"Then you don't get your cake!" Mag taunted, starting to take off the cake cover. **(Ha ha!)**

He quickly opened the door, "Oh no you don't! It's _my_ birthday and _my _cake!" He snatched it out of her hands and walked over to the stairs, sitting down next to the bucket of ice cream.

She followed behind him, sniffing the crack in the box. She sat next to him, smiling wide.

"Why was your nose pressed against the crack?" He asked, seeing frosting on the tip of it.

"That's what the crow said!" Mag exclaimed before grabbing the box from Nathan's hands. **(No no, I think it's 'Why was your face pressed against the crack?')**

He froze for a minute, "What the hell are you talking about?"

She laughed hysterically, nearly dropping the cake. Then she looked at him, as serious as she could get and said, "Whatever you eat comes out your butt."

Nathan looked at her again, his face blank. "What's _wrong_ with you?"

"Unless you throw up…" Mag finished, now smiling at Nathan.

"Okay, I have to say this is appropriate to say. What the fuck?" **(Yeah, that's all I can think of to respond.)**

"I don't know, I heard someone's phone going off and that's what it was." Mag laughed, snuggling the cake close to her.

"Now I'm not hungry…" He stood up and walked away from Mag, "And for that, you're bowel movement!"

She gasped, "How dare you?" **(Especially since I'm sure she can kill you.)**

"I was thinking of a comeback to use your name and the first letters of Blind Mag are BM." He explained, grabbing the ice cream bucket.

"I don't get eaten and then crapped out or whatever!" Mag fought back, standing up.

"That sounds wrong… but, seriously, just leave it be…" His voice was steady as he was ready to end the conversation.

"How can I leave it be when you call me shit?" Mag retorted, not even ever so slightly calming down.

"I didn't literally call you… you know what?" He brought the bucket closer to his face, "I'm gonna nom the ice cream, and you can have the cake. Maybe we can trade off…"

He looked at Mag who had already opened the cake, eyeing it with longing, drool coming out of the corner of her mouth. **(I never thought someone would **_**actually**_** drool, but this **_**is**_** Mag we're talking about here.)** "Fine," She sat back down and stuck her face in it while voicing, "Nom nom!"

"… or not…" He opened the lid to the ice cream and stuck a spoon into it, "Do you want a spoon?" **(Can she hear you?)**

Mag lifted her head up, frosting and pieces of cake covered her face. Nathan bust up laughing, searching through his pants pocket and pulled out a small napkin, extending his arm out to Mag, "I think you have some, frosting, there on your face, and hair…"

"Thank you, but I can clean it up myself." She shooed his hand away.

"Do you need any utensils to nom your cake with, over there?" Nathan asked, a few giggles escaping his lips every now and then. **(Yeah, I have to say no. I'm sure she wouldn't since, well, have you **_**seen**_** her? "Yup…")**

"No, no I don't." She stuck her hand into the cake and pulled out some of the, uh… **(Drawing a blank here…)**, "Not when I have my hands to help me." Mag brought the cake-covered hand up to her mouth and shoveled it in.

Nathan looked on in disgust, pulling the spoon out of the ice cream and licking off what was on it. Shilo, of course, stood at the top of the steps looking at her father. **(Wait, how'd you get out of the room? "I have my ways…" Yeah… uh… sure…) **"So this is why you locked me in my room, so you can eat _ice cream_?"

"Well, yes and no." He took another bite of the cold frozen milk and other products. **(*sighs* I just don't want to keep saying ice cream)**

"Mag, do you think this is even right?" She looked down to the back of her god mother whom was still sitting on the steps, piling handfuls of cake into her mouth. **(Should I get you a shovel? Would it make it easier for you to nom the cake? "YES! YOU ARE A GENIUS! BRB")**

Mag turned around and looked at Shilo, "Sure," her voice was muffled by what she had in her mouth. **(Storing that cake for the winter, are we?)**

Shilo took a step back in horror, "What are you, _animals?_" **(When it comes to sweet products and coffee, I'd have to say yes. "Did someone say… COFFEE?" Oh god, why did I use the 'C' word around Mag? Remind me never to do that again…)**

Mag nodded her head and continued to eat the cake until it was all gone. She then turned back around to look at Shilo, "Yes."

"Ew," Shilo grunted, looking at her god mom in disgust. "That's just… I'm gonna leave now." She turned around and high-tailed herself out of the _craziness_.

"What's wrong with her?" Mag looked back at Nathan who was now holding his head. "What's wrong with you?"

"Too much ice cream, too little time," he whispered, kicking the bucket over. **(Don't be mean to the ice cream because you were such an idiot!)**

"BRAINFREEZE!" Mag screeched as she jumped up and walked over to Nathan, "You're an idiot!"

"I'm the idiot?" Nathan removed his hands from his head and glared at Mag, "You're the one that slid down that rail like three or four times, failing each time. You also fell on that ice, face planting into the windows. Who the hell's the idiot?"

"But…" Mag looked at him sadly, tears leaking out of her eyes. **(Aw… now look at what you've done, Nathan. You made Mag cry…)**

"Just leave." He pointed towards the door.

"Nathan…" She looked at him with puppy dog eyes. **(Now you can't resist that! "Watch me." You're such a party pooper, Nathan…)**

"Go." He walked over to the door and opened it, "Right now."

"Fine, but I'll be back!"

"No. No you will not. I will Repo your eyes and kill you if you come back." **(Nathan!)**

Mag gasped and backed away, "No, no… Nathan…"

"Leave!"

"Fine…" Mag walked slowly towards the door and stepped outside. "Goodbye, Nathan." She held out a hand.

"Goodbye, Mag." He pushed her making her slip on the ice and fall down the stairs. **(NO!)**

Mag sat up and looked at the door Nathan had just closed, "Don't worry, I'll be back… and prepared." She got on her feet and slowly walked over to the random limo parked outside. "I'll be back…" **(Okay, you and your random frickin limos, wtf?)**

**A/N: And that ends chapter 6. Well… um… goodbye now… chip chip… ass chips… YAY! Have fun… waiting… for the next chapter…**


	8. So This Is Christmas

**A/N: My loveydoodles! It's been a while hasn't it? Well, I couldn't leave without a Christmas special, now, can I? I know it's late what with Winter Break and all. Excluding the fact that I have no internet and even if I did, FanFiction is blocked on my school laptop :( So waiting until school is back so I have internetz… **

…

Mag walked up to the Wallace's gate, a huge smile plastered on her face. With her free hand, she opened the gate so she could get in and tip-toed up to the front door. **(Ready for Christmas, hoping Nathan forgives you? "Yup :D") **She knocked on the door and waited for it to be answered. Nathan came to the door and opened it a crack, "Mag, didn't I tell you not to come back? Didn't I?"

"You did, you did…" Mag lowered her head in shame.

"Are you mocking me?" He put his hands on his hips.

"No… just let me in, okay? It's Christmas and I have presents for you and Shilo." She held up a bag with two wrapped items in it.

"Well, good, I suppose. I have a present for you." **(You were expecting her to come back, weren't you? "*sighs* Yup")**

Mag's smile grew wider, showing her teeth, "Really, now?"

"Yes, so come in…" He backed up and gestured inside. She gladly took the invitation and ran inside, stopping when she hit the tree in the middle of the foyer. **(Omigod, Mag…)**

"When'd that get there?" She removed herself from the tree, taking out tinsel from her hair. "Did you open your presents yet?" She turned to face Nathan.

"Yeah, Shilo got up early and squealed about 'Santa' being here." He smiled and pointed towards the full stockings on the false fire place. **(You never told her? She's 17! "But she's my baby…" Wow…)**

"You know, Nathan, Shilo told me she didn't believe in Santa anymore. I'm surprised you hadn't caught onto that by now."

"What are you talking about?" He looked at Mag accusingly, "You didn't tell her that it was me, did you?"

"No, she figured it out on her own. She saw you fill up the stockings a few years back. She only pretends she still believes to make you happy." **(Mag **_**might**_** be lying… Don't tell Shilo **_**anything**_** about this, Nathan… Just let her keep pretending…)** Mag smiled, "I used to do that with my parents."

"But you were blind."

"Hurtful!" She crossed her arms like an angry child, "That still hurts very much deep inside."

Nathan let out an irritated sigh, "Take a seat on the floor. I'll go get Shilo."

Mag nodded and sat cross legged on the floor, setting the present beside her. She hummed "Jingle Bells" as she waited for Nathan and Shilo to return.

"Mag!" Shilo ran over to Mag and hugged her, nearly making her bionic eyes pop out. **(Like a cartoon :D)**

"Presents!" Mag pushed Shilo away and ran over to Nathan who was holding a small wrapped box.

"Holy shit, slow down, Mag!" Nathan threw the box at Mag, which hit her in the face.

"Ow," Mag frowned but quickly picked up the present and sat back down. "Sit," She demanded, pointing to the ground.

"Okay," Nathan took a spot by her, smiling as he shifted in a more comfortable position. "I hope you like what I got you. Maybe we can use it sometime…"

"Ugh, really dad?" Shilo complained, sitting on the other side of Mag. **(Ugh, maybe I don't want to know what it is…)** "Open it, though, I picked it out." **(Never mind… if she picked it out)**

"Okay!" Mag didn't hesitate and ripped off the wrapping paper like her life depended on it. **(And I'm sure it scattered **_**everywhere**_**)** When Mag finally opened the box, she looked at Nathan in puzzlement, "Why would they put key lime pie in a jar?"

Nathan looked over to the object Mag had in her hands, "No, honey, that's the flavor of the lotion." He pointed out, watching Mag rolling the jar anxiously in her hands. **(Flavor? Did you really just say flavor?)**

"Oh," She opened the jar and stuck her nose in it, "It smells divine!" She started to stick her hand in the jar before Nathan could say anything else.

"Wait, I meant scent of it. The scent is key lime pie…"

Too late, when Nathan looked back over to Mag she had her fingers in her mouth and her face twisted in disgust. "Ugh, this doesn't taste like pie at all! It tastes like shit. They're horrible, you should get a refund!" **(Mag, you big dope, you aren't supposed to **_**eat**_** it!)**

"Mag, no eating it!" He grabbed the lotion out of her hands and ripped her fingers away from her face. "It's not flavored like that. It only smells like that."

"Then why did you say it was flavored?" She glared at him. **(Because he wanted to see your reaction when you ate it. "Actually, yeah… I thought it would be funny as hell and I was right!" lol)**

"I meant scented." He picked up the lid that was laying on the ground and screwed it back onto the jar. "Now, don't eat it ever again."

Mag grunted in irritation before grabbing one of the nicely wrapped boxes next to her, "Here, open your gift!" She gently handed it to Shilo.

"Thank you," She dipped her head in gratitude. "Now… opening it…" She peeled off the first corner and then the other. After a while of carefully taking off the paper, she was face to face with a box that shocked her. "What the hell do you call this?" She held it up so both Mag and her father could see. "Does it look like I'm pregnant to you?"

"Mag," Nathan looked over to Mag, a mischievous smile spread across her lips.

"I mean, I haven't even slept with a man!" Shilo gasped again, throwing the box on the floor.

"Just open it. I used that box because it was the only one in my… I mean, it was just to screw with you." **(Whoa… only box in your house? Was that what you were about to say? "*scoffs nervously* No…")** Mag blushed before picking up the pregnancy test box and handing it back to Shilo.

"Whatever you say…" Shilo grabbed it again and opened the top peering inside. "I love it!" She grabbed out two silver talons, **(Hey, if memory served me correctly, those are your Chromaggia talons… right? Right?... Hello?)**

"I was going to use those for my final performance… but seeing as to how I decided not to retire… so… yeah…" **(Although, I'm sure Nathan wouldn't mind if you did now…)** Mag smiled and patted Shilo's leg, "I hope you enjoy… and you can use those for anyone who might try to jump you on the streets." **(Like she'd ever be able to go out… "Shush!")**

"Thank you, Mag!" She leaned over and hugged her god mother.

"Now," Mag picked up the second present, "Open your gift." She threw it at Nathan.

"Payback?" He chuckled as he stretched out to grab the box which had coincidentally rolled under the tree.

"OPEN!" Mag backhanded Nathan's arm, making him drop the box again.

"I can't open it if you smack it out of my hand." Nathan complained.

"I love you guys!" Shilo laughed as she watched the two adults glaring at each other. **(I do too :D)**

"Yeah, yeah… open the present!" Mag bobbed up and down in excitement. "I had a coffee crash so I can't remember what I gave you guys!"

"Shuttup! I thought you wanted me to open your gift!" Mag stopped and gave her attention to Nathan. "Okay…" He started to carefully unwrap the box, but after a few failed attempts to even tear the first corner he turned to look at Mag with a red face, "Use enough tape?"

"I thought you were tougher than that." She sneered. **(Can't tell if tape obsession or just want to screw with people…)**

Nathan grunted and forcefully ripped the package open, revealing a pretty pink and blue box with little yellow ducklings. "Why did you put it in a baby's gift box? Do I look like a baby to you?" **(Of course! You're such a cute baby, I can just throw you against a wall that I love you so much… 3) **He cocked his head to the side, staring at Mag (**like this: -o-… Never mind…**) "Don't answer that…" He quickly said before Mag could open her mouth.

"Open it, dad, I'm sure she got you some cute little booties!" Shilo mocked, now laughing at the little box.

"You know what? SHUT UP!" He looked back down to the box, "Okay, now…" He lifted the top flap and pulled out a small-like object wrapped in teddy bear paper. "Oh my god, Mag, you went all out on making me look babyish, didn't you?" **(Watch it be a knife or something)**

Mag snorted and shook her head, "Just continue…" She sat up and pulled a random candy cane off the tree and started to eat it. **(Candy cane thief!)**

"Okay…" Nathan took the end of the paper and slowly unwrapped it, nervous as to what might be concealed under the paper. When he finally reached the object, he threw it on the ground and wiped his hands on his pants. "That's disgusting! I can't believe I touched that!"

"How do you know it was used?" Mag casually asked, leaning back on one hand and using the other to twirl the candy cane in her mouth.

"Was it?" He looked down to the pregnancy test on the floor. **(Lol, I'd laugh if she peed on it, just to fuck with you. "I did XD" Did I mention that I love you?)**

"Look at it…" Mag smiled, gesturing towards the test on the floor.

"Fine," He picked it up and flipped it around. "Wait, but it's positive… is this some joke?"

"I can't remember… it might be some random one off the street, it might be Marni's, or it might be mine." She flicked her foot back and forth innocently before crunching down on the candy cane. **(But I thought you said... *gasp* :O "I said I don't know…" With you, no one knows…)**

"Mag, this is a big deal… and if you got it from the street… Ew." He threw the stick at Mag.

"I didn't get it from the street." Mag admitted, "I'm trying to remember. But in the meantime, we should nom some food. I know I'm not the only hungry one in here…" She got up and started walk towards the kitchen, "Right?"

Nathan shook his head, "We already ate, but you're welcome to it." **(I hope you didn't want any leftovers…)**

Mag smiled and continued on into the kitchen. She looked around spotting a half eaten ham still steaming on the island counter. It was accompanied by a bowl of stuffing, mashed potatoes, some type of pudding and two pies.

"Oh, yum!" She patted her empty stomach and grabbed the spoon from the potatoes. She took a big scoop and stuck it in her mouth just as Shilo walked in. She turned around to look at the young girl and waved since her mouth was full. **(I would figure she'd be like Kirby and suck it all down like a vacuum. Then stand up with her hands above her head and cutely say, 'Hi'… Sorry, I can just imagine it… Mag-Kirby… yup- never mind…)**

"You're supposed to put it on a plate."

"But I don't want to," Mag said after she gulped what she had in her mouth down. "Wait," she held a hand, stopping where she was.

"Are you all right?" **(Well, she **_**did**_** just eat a huge spoonful of food…)**

"I don't know." She admitted a hand on her stomach, "I feel like I'm going to vomit…"

"Where did this come from?" Nathan asked as he stomped into the room, holding up the mysterious test. **(Why are you still holding it then?)**

"Like I said, I don't know!" Mag replied back hastily. "I just want to eat…" She turned back to the counter of food and grabbed a pie. "What kind is this one?"

"Cherry," Shilo smiled, "I made it myself."

"Thank you, Shi! I've been craving cherry pie for a while now, but your father wouldn't make me any because he's mean. D:" **(I know!) **Mag grabbed the knife which was sitting between the pies and cut out a slice. She walked over and brought down a plate from the cupboard, putting the slice of pie on it. She picked up a random fork and sat it on the plate. **(Damn random forks!)** Mag turned to Shilo, her arm extended with the plate, "Here,"

"Thanks, Mag!" Shilo didn't hesitate to rip the plate from her god mom's hand.

Mag turned around and grabbed the rest of the pie and another fork, "None for you!" She growled to Nathan before walking out of the kitchen. **(Okay, then…)**She came back in and looked at Nathan, "And remember: _always_ bet on Pinkie Pie." **(Because even a little pony knows when it's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum.)** She took a bite of pie and walked back out of the room. **(Although, I'd have to say always bet on Mag… she has the best solutions for everything, even though most of them are to kill the person.)**

"Has she told _you_ anything about this?" Nathan held up the object as he asked his daughter the question.

"Not that I know of… but if it _is_ hers, congratumalations daddy!" Shilo laughed, handing the piece of pie to her father. "Here… I think you deserve this." She walked out of the room, leaving Nathan standing alone. Shock coursed his entire body. **(You just done fucked up now, haven't you? "SHUT. IT.")**

**A/N: I don't know if this was a chapter or a special… maybe a special chapter. Eh, whatever, I hoped you liked… Hit review and tell me what you think, Mag would muchly appreciate it ;D**


	9. A Tiny Surprise

**A/N: I wasn't even thinking about really making Mag have a baby in this story. I mean… look at her! But if that's what the crowd wants, I'll do it. (Not that I have any problem with it.) We'll find out though, won't we? (I think so…) **

**Note: Excuse me if my chapters, this one and previous, seem weird and random. I know they're jumbled together but that's just how my mind works.**

…

"Here I am!" Mag come running back into the kitchen, her arms spread out on both sides. Her voice was sing-songy. **("Songy isn't a word!" I don't care, Mag! **_**Songy**_** is a word in my dictionary!)**

"I see. There you are…" Nathan looked at the woman in confusion. **(I would too, if someone did that. Did you call her in there? "No," oh, well then, that doesn't explain anything…)**

Mag moves forward, continuing her little song, "Raunchy like a hurricane!"

"Uh, say what now?" Nathan still holds the piece of pie his daughter gave him as he stepped back. He didn't know what the hell was going on or why Mag was vulgar like a hurricane. **(Lol, although, those words sound so familiar, yet, not quite right…)**

"You don't know that song?" Mag dropped her arms and looked at Nathan in disbelief. "You sang it when we were kids. It was so cute!"

"I think you mean, '_rock you_ like a hurricane.' Not raunchy." He laughed before giving a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness, though, I thought you'd gone crazy." **(I thought she was already there…)**

"So all these years as I sat in my room alone, bellowing out into my hairbrush, I've been singing the wrong words," She hung her head in sorrow, sniffling.

"You're such a big baby-" Nathan stopped his sentence, looking at the stick that was in his other hand. "Is this yours or not?" **(Although how pleasing that would be if it was hers, I think it isn't a great idea to have a **_**Mag**_** make a life. I mean, she's Mag!)**

"I don't remember." Mag crossed her arms in a child-like manner.

"What do you mean 'you don't remember'? Come on, Mag, we can't play this game. Did you put an unused one in the bottom of the box in case you didn't remember?"

"Possibly," They both looked at each other for a moment before running off into the foyer where the box lay on its side. Mag picked it up and tilted it upside down, shaking it vigorously. "Hoping I did. Knowing me…"

Nathan sighed in relief as a small thud sounded when something hit the ground. He picked up the pregnancy test- this one being unused. **(Well, at least she was smart enough to do that. See, even she knows she's like… uh… she's like a Mag. There we go.)** "It's unused. Now, use it." He handed it to Mag who snatched it from his hand and sped off to the bathroom. Nathan followed behind. **(Perve. "Am not!" Are too! "Am not!" I'm not playing this game with you right now… *cough* are too…)**

Nathan closed the door behind him and turned to see Mag using the test. "Lol, I watch as you pee!" **(That's not creepy at all…)**

"Nathan!" She put the now used test on the sink, "NO watching as I pee." She backhanded him on his arm, "Lol, I laugh as I hit you. Payback's a bitch, ain't it?" **(Yup, and hilarious too, when you're the one inflicting it.)**

"Oooooooh, shut it!" Nathan complained, holding his arm. "You started it…"

"I didn't start anything! You started to watch me urinate, you little pervert. What are you, five?" Mag scoffed, washing her hands in the sink next to her. **(Hey, age or maturity levels don't matter for a person with a dick. "Are you **_**defending**_** him?" No, no I'm not.)**

"Yeah, sure, we'll go with that." He smiled and opened the door. "I'm going to go eat some pie." Walking out the door, Nathan started to hum.

Mag followed behind him, stopping when they reached the kitchen. "Apple pie, do you have any?" She looked at the remaining pie that was sitting on the counter.

"You're just in luck." He picked it up and held it in front of Mag's nose. "That's what I have here." He reached over and grabbed a fork that sat on the counter too. "But, you don't get any since you didn't share that cherry pie with me." Nathan dug his fork into the middle of the pie and took out a chunk, slowly raising it up to his mouth. **(You're so mean. That's not very nice to do to a lady. You **_**never**_** take her pie away. Wait… chocolate… no, this is Mag. You never take her COFFEE away…)**

Mag had her mouth open in angst to taste the pie. The smell wafted into her nostrils making her yearn for the taste and savor every last bite. "One bite," She pleaded, inching her face closer to the pie pan.

"Fine," Nathan scooped out another bite of pie and brought it up to Mag's mouth. She quickly grabbed the fork from his hand making Nathan flinch and back away in fear.

"Thanks!" She stuck the fork in her mouth and gobbled up what was on it, barely taking the time to chew. **(Slow down there, Magdalene! Jeez, no wonder why you get sick!) **As she licked the fork clean, Nathan warily crept closer to her. "I need that fork back."

"Mine!" She held it close to her body in an attempt to protect it. "I want some more pie!"

"My pie!" Nathan reached out and grasped onto the fork, trying to yank it away. Mag only held on tighter as she fought back. **(Didn't he have that piece of cherry pie or did it just poof into thin air?)**

"I'll make you a whole pot of coffee if you give my fork back!" Nathan bribed. Her eyes lit up, making her release the fork. Nathan lost his balance and ended up falling to the floor.** (Well, at least he has his fork back.)**

"COFFEE!" **(You can get Mag to do anything if you bribe her with coffee.)** She jumped up and down a few times before taking a seat at the table. She impatiently waited for her coffee as she bounced up and down.

"Wow," Nathan grunted as he got up. "I should have known better to _let go of the fork_ before I told you about coffee." He got up and walked over to the sink to rinse his fork off.

"Maybe you should grow a brain cell in that department." Mag taunted, letting out a few anxious giggles.

"Don't make me _not_ make you coffee!" He swung around and glared at Mag.

Her eyes melted into anger, "Don't make me take away your fork and stick it in your leg." She growled, clenching her fists. **(See, this is why you don't mess with Mag's coffee. She **_**will**_** kill you!)**

"Calm down!" Nathan turned around in a panic and tried to quickly make the coffee. "Oh god," He stopped where he was and turned his back towards the coffee pot.

"What is it?" Mag stood up and headed in his direction.

"Nothing," Nathan pressed his back against the counter.

"You're hiding something." She looked at him suspiciously.

"Ok, you'll find out eventually." He moved away from the pot and gestured at it, "We're out of coffee grounds."

Mag held her chest where her heart would be and gasped dramatically, "NO! Not my precious coffee!" **(Wait, do you even have a heart then? "That question will remain unanswered." "Shush, Nathan! I do have a heart!" Ok… ok then… )**

"I'm so sorry, please don't hurt me…" Nathan looked pitifully up at Mag.

"I should." She sneered, "You promised me coffee. I want my coffee! _Now!_" **(Just hit him and get it done already!)** She loomed over Nathan's cowering form, as he tried to make himself smaller. With a raise of an arm, Mag backhanded him hard on the arm, making Nathan squeak in pain. "Bitch," she insulted.

Nathan looked at his arm to see a hand print welted onto his skin. He gasped in surprise and stared at Mag who was ready to leave the kitchen. "So," he forced a smile, "Want to get coffee? Maybe you can go slip on that ice some more out there." **(Are you just asking to get hit, **_**again**_**?)**

"Shut up!" Mag stomped back over to the man who instigated her.

"No, please, I didn't mean it!" His eyes widened in fear of getting hit again. "Mag, please!"

A faint beeping went off, stopping Mag in her tracks. "You hear that? Or am I just crazy." **(I know you want to comment on that one, Nate. "No… I don't want to get hurt…" Aw, but it's hilarious! "*glares*")**

"I think it was the alarm in the bathroom that we set. The test is over, pencils down." **(Hold on, when did you set an alarm? I don't recollect you doing so…)**

"Say what now?" Mag looked at him like he said something stupid. **(Doesn't he always?)**

"Let's just go travel towards the bathroom, okay?" He stood fully up and gestured for Mag to follow him.

"Oh," She shook her head and followed Nathan to the bathroom. He stopped in the doorway as soon as the test was in sight and fell back into Mag's arms. "What the hell are you doing, Nate?" She looked down to see an unconscious Nathan in her arms. Scoffing, Mag slapped his face a few times making the man wake up in a panic. **(Unrelated to the story… I was typing panic and it corrected it to pancake, {I know I probably added a character or two by accident}, but it was funny that he woke up in a pancake for a while there. Although, I wonder how that could happen… must be on GIANT pancake.)**

"You _are_ pregnant."

"What?" Mag ran forward, tripping over Nathan. "That's not right. I swear to god I didn't do anything bad." **(*Coughs* Yeah, right, nothing at alllllllll)**

"There should be laws about people like you." Nathan nonchalantly stated as he stood up. **(Stupid people? There's too many, especially in your time…)** "Now," He walked to Mag and started to rub her stomach. "Who's my little fetus? Who is? Yeah, you are!" **(And **_**you**_** aren't at all… no… not stupid at all)**

"What are you doing?" Mag slapped his hand away.

"The baby's mine, isn't it?"

"I think so…" She pondered for a moment.

"You _think_ so? Have you slept with any other man besides me?" She shook her head. "Then it's mine."

"But how did it get in there?" **(h-how did it get in there? I don't want to keep reading any longer…)**

"Through your belly button," Nathan answered sarcastically.

"Woah, that's cool dude." She bent her head down as she lifted her dress up to look at her stomach. "I wonder how it got through my belly button." **(God, I hope you're playing around.)**

"I thank you for wearing underwear." Nathan grabbed the bottom of Mag's dress from her hands and released it. "I was kidding. Do you know how babies are made?" **(And I thought you would have this talk with someone waaaay younger than her. Lol)**

"Of course I do. You know, it takes more than humor to entertain you." Mag snorted before hitting Nathan on the same spot again. "They are made in a woman's belly." She stuck her tongue out at him. **(Well… never mind…)**

"Where do they come from?" **(Would you just give up?)**

"I dunno, can I just finish your pie?" She put a hand on her hip.

"Wha- NO!" Nathan gave her a hard stare. "It's my pie, leave it alone!" He ran out of the bathroom, laughing manically. **(Sad part is, I can actually see him doing that…)**

"Whatever- oh, hi Shilo!" Shilo walked into the room. **(…as Mag was about to have a deep conversation with herself.) **

"Hey Mag! Dad told me you were expecting." **(How? I thought he was blinded by the pie!)**

"You'll be a big sister!" Mag chimed with a big smile.

Shilo nodded, "That's interesting. I think it'd be fun!" She looked down to Mag's stomach, "Soon you'll look like you swallowed a watermelon."

"No, no I won't." She shook her head in disbelief, "YOU WILL!" Mag ran out of the bathroom and followed Nathan's tracks into the kitchen. He was leaning against a counter eating pie.

"Your daughter is mean." She whined, stomping her foot.

"What are you, five!" **(Haha, the tables have turned…)**

"No, I'm thirty-six." Her frown grew as she watched him stuff more pie into his mouth.

Nathan stopped and looked up at her, "You want some?" He asked with his mouth still full. She nodded sorrowfully. He tilted his head to the side, softening his expression. "Here," he walked up to Mag and handed her the pie pan.

She gratefully took it and looked inside. "I hate you." Mag simply stated when she realized that the pie was gone. With the anger taking over her, she threw the pie pan at Nathan's face. "Why do you do such cruel things? First, you take away my coffee, now you take away my pie! I hope you eat dirt and die, trash!" **(Isn't that a little harsh?)**

"Well then, since I'm wanted dead by more than one person, I should just go kill myself." He walked away with a blank expression. **(No, please don't'! I don't want you dead! "But you say it all the time…" I don't mean it, it's more like a term of endearment.)**

"Where are you going?"

"I have the ability to kill and I'm sure I can kill myself." Nathan answered, stopping at the door.

"Don't," Mag hesitated before continuing. "I don't want you to die," she whispered.

"What?"

"I-I-I I don't want you to die." She admitted more loudly.

"You know what this means? This marks a new step in our relationship. I hope we can become better friends now." Nathan smiled as he stood next to her.

"Don't count on it." She turned away from him. **(Oh wow, Mag. You bring him up to his feet only to kick him in the nuts.)**

"Okay then…" He walked away from the rejection. "I love you too, meanie."

"Meanie? MEANIE!" Mag swung around and faced the man who insulted her. "How dare you insult me like that?" **(Insult? Not that bad of an insult. You called Nathan a bitch, now that's an insult. A freaking hilarious insult, but an insult nonetheless.)**

"Meanie is not that bad of an insult. And which reminds me, you called me a bitch. I am _not_!" He put fists on his hips and glared at the singer.

"Glaring is not going to intimidate me. But I know what'll weaken you." A smile stretched across her thin lips as she crept toward Nathan.

"No, not the creepy smile, please! PEDOPHILE! HELP ME, HELP ME! THERE'S A PEDOPHILE TRYING TO RAPE ME! ANYONE?" He shouted desperately, as he ran into the foyer and hid in his corner. **(Yay! There's that damn corner again.)**

"I'm not going to rape you… although," She poked his stomach. "Rape!" **(See, you show her new things to use against you. Who's the smart one now?)**

"Bad!" He smacked her finger, "Bad finger, bad Mag!"

"I'm not saying it."

"Say what?"

"Never mind," She shook her head, giving up.

"I murdered your raping finger!" Nathan busted out laughing. **(Don't worry, she has nine others. Just like you…)** "I- I can't believe you fell for it."

"What the hell are you talking about? Did I miss the memo for the meeting of stupidity?"

"No, but… I can't remember anything anymore. I think we should get some coffee." Nathan suggested as he pulled himself away from the corner.

"So you can watch me fall?" **(Of course!)**

"Pft, _no_."

"Oh, ok! Let's go!" Mag happily trotted over to the front door and opened it.

"Alright then," Nathan followed.

"Wait," She turned around to look at Nathan. "I _did_ get pregnant through my belly button. You raped me with your finger. Oh god, I hope I didn't get you pregnant…" **(Uh… I don't know how to respond to this…)**

Nathan gawked at her with a '_what in the hell are you talking about'_ look. "You know what, I'm not going to answer that."

"But it may be a problem. How will it come out? It'll get stuck!" **(Don't forget that it'll just keep growing and soon, no clothes in the world would fit Nathan. "Omigod! What are we going to do?")**

"Walk. Just walk." He pointed out the door.

"Bu-"

"No, no, just walk." He gave her a gentle nudge on the back.

She lowered her head in shame, "Okay…"

…..

**A/N: What better way to end it? I hope you enjoy and your heart swells with joy. Or you'll explode from laughing. Or get anxious for the next Chappy. I lost myself… Oh, yeah, Mag says you should review, isn't that right? "I said no such thing." LIAR! SHE'S LYING! SHE IS SOOOOOO LYING!**


	10. Nathan's Milkshakes

**A/N: I just randomly came up with this as I was going to bed one night. I at least had a bit of the story down. I hope you like it and I also hope it makes sense. For one: I want to write it down before I forget and two: I'm running off of coffee so I'm jittery. Thank you! Lol **

…**..**

"What are these?" Nathan asked running into the foyer to Mag holding something in his hands. "Are they yours?" He held up a pair of fake, silicone breasts.

"Where did you get those?" "I found them in your purse." Nathan smiled, squishing the objects in his hands.

"Why were you in my purse? What have I told you?" She scolded, placing her hands on her hips.

"To never touch your things or else you'd rip my balls off…" He solemnly repeated her words. **(Hmm, I wonder what else she has in there...)**

"Yes, now put them back." Mag tried to grab the objects, but he pulled away.

"Why do you have fake silicone boob things?" He held them up to his eyes just as Mag glared at him. **(This ought to be good)**

"Rotti has me wear them, now give 'em back!" She charged forward, her hands stuck out in front of her.

"Why? Aren't yours good enough?" Nathan maneuvered around Mag. "Sometimes I wish I had boobs." **(Heh heh… what?)**

"Nathan…. I don't know how to reply to that one…." She put her hands on her hips for a moment. "Oh, now I do! Give those damned things to me!" She back handed him, forcing one of the pseudo breasts to fall out of his hands.

"NO!" Before Mag could even bend down, he grabbed it. "I want to try them on!"

"As much fun as it would be, Mr. Moob, I don't think so." Mag charged forward once again as Nathan dodged out of the way.

"Please?" He ran up to the top of the stairs and looked down to Mag. She looked at him questioningly as he pulled the collar of his shirt away. "And you can't stop me!" He teased, putting the objects in his shirt on his chest. **(I'm concerned for this man… greatly. "As am I and this baby…" Mag… I honestly forgot about that… "*Slaps on wrist* BAD!" I've been chastised…)**

"Nate- stop right now!" Mag started to climb the stairs.

Acting quickly, Nathan groped his pseudo breasts. "I've always wanted to do this if I were a chick… or at least had moobs." **(What, grope yourself?)**

"I don't think groping yourself would be very appropriate in public, Nathan…" Mag laughed.

"No, no…" He smiled widely and took a deep breath. "My- milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard!" **(XDD Oh my…)**

Mag's eyes widened in shock, "I- what the hell?" Cocking her head to the side, Mag bit her lip trying to stop herself from laughing.

"And they're like, they're better than yours!" He turned around and shook his butt at her, slapping it a couple of times. "And damn right, they're better than yours!" **(Damn right!)**

"No, your milkshakes don't bring all the boys to the… yard?" The singer looked around her for a moment. "And they sure as hell aren't better than mine!" Mag shook her head as she finished her journey up the stairs. "Mine are real." **(True, true…)**

Nathan turned around in time to see Mag push her breasts up with the tops of her hands. "I bet you can't beat these!" He pointed to his new-found chest proudly.

"Now, give them back! You've finished your stupid song." She gestured for him to give them back.

"NO! I'm not finished with my song!" Nathan jumped and ran down the hallway, making Mag chase after him.

"Get back here!"

"NO!" "NATHAN!" Mag ran past Shilo's room which was open. Her god daughter looked out into the hall to see what was happening. Without thinking, she ran after Mag.

"Give me back my boobs!" "NO!" Nathan stopped at the end of the hall and groped his chest again. "One more round."

"No, Nate…" Mag shook her head. "Give me them back!" **(He's too attached…)**

"I can teach you, but I have to charge!" He continued sticking his tongue out.

"Nate- I, no- Nathan! Stop it! Stop it or I'll have to beat you!" She curled her hands into fists, stomping her foot.

"Oh, please!" He scoffed. "I'm not afraid of you!" **(Yes you are- "Shut up!")**

"Nathan! Drop your hands!" Mag ordered, pointing to his hands which were still groping his chest. "Drop them…" She warned, taking a step forward. He threw his hands up in surrender before putting them to his sides. "Good boy, now, take the silicone boobs out of your shirt." Nodding, he did as he was told and took them out. "Give them to me." He hesitated for a second before walking up to her to give them back. Giving a sniffle, he handed them to her. "Thank you." Mag turned around to see her god daughter, her mouth agape. "Shi, if you wouldn't mind, could you go take these somewhere and never let your father near them again?"

"S-sure…" Mag smiled and dropped the warm breasts in Shilo's hands. Wordlessly, Shilo ran off. **(I swear, she always has to come at the oddest of times. I don't get why she always has to walk in when you two are doing something stupid like this…. Why not when you're having a nice conversation about last night's dinner? Huh?)**

"What were you thinking?" Mag turned back around to see Nathan wiping his eyes.

"You're so mean…" **(Since when did you become the kid?)**

"Mean?" Mag fumed, "You were the one rummaging through my things!"

"It was fun for a moment until you took them away." He whined. "But, you can do it too and soon you'll have big breasts from being pregnant!"

"What?" Mag looked down to her chest. "I would never do something as humiliating as that!"

"Oh, so that time when you wore that chicken costume-" "I thought I told you to never bring that up again!" Mag stopped him before he could go any further. **(Hah, I want to know! I want to know! "See, now you've gotten **_**her **_**wondering!**_**"**_**)**

"You know your milkshakes will bring all the boys to the yard… Hell, you don't even need them." Nathan prodded one of her breasts. "Lol."

"What are you trying to do?" She asked, squinting at him as he still had a finger on her chest. "Do you have a death wish?" **(Yes, actually, I think he does…) **She growled in annoyance, "Take your finger off."

"Oh, so when I act stupid _one_ time, I'm an idiot?" He retorted, "But when you do it, it's normal?" **(But she's naturally like that. It's rare when she's adult-like.)**

Mag scoffed, grabbing Nathan's hand. "You should have taken your finger away!" Crushing his fingers in her hand, she walked off, dragging him behind.

"Ow… ow… ow… what is wrong with you…?" Nathan tried to keep up with her, groaning in pain as they turned random corners.

"You still owe me coffee." She stopped, yanking the man forward. "I want my coffee!" She whined. The familiar childish twinkle had entered her eyes once again. **(There's the Mag we all know and love. *Squee* "Aw, I wuv you too!")**

"Coffee…? Shit… I forgot about that…" Jerking his hand away, his eyes widened. "I need to make some. Stay here, I'll be back." He ran off, leaving Mag to stand in the hall alone with all of the creepy holographic pictures of Marni. **(Ugh, I feel sorry for ya there…)**

Looking around, she noticed a window at the end of the hallway. She walked towards it, noticing there was something wearing one of Marni's old black dresses. "Wow… a manikin that looks a lot like Marni…" Pressing her face against the glass, she examined further. "Too much like Marni and so realistic." **(I hope its fake…)**

"What're you doing?" Nathan's voice startled Mag, making her hit her nose on the glass.

"I was admiring this replica of Marni." She nonchalantly stated, turning around.

"It's not a replica. It's her body." Nathan shook his head like she was stupid. **(Wait… come again?)**

"Her- her body?" The soprano took a dramatic gulp. "Why do you have her body in your walls?" **(He's just that sick! "No-No I'm not!" Then why do you have her body in the wall? "Uh…")**

"No reason!" Nathan quickly walked away, Mag following shortly behind him.

"Did you make the coffee?" Mag stopped at the bottom of the stairs when they hit the entryway. "Because I want some!" **(Of course you do…)**

"Yes… I started it." He confirmed. "But… there's no pie left." He frantically said, grabbing a hold of her arms. "There's no pie! Oh god, Mag. You have to calm down… okay? Calm down and don't worry. We'll have to get more pie… okay." Nathan started to hyperventilate. **(Are you obsessed with pie? Are you gonna die now?)**

"Nathan… let go of me." She tried to pry his arms away but he stared at her with wide, wild eyes. "Nathan!" She kicked her leg up, making it hit between Nathan's legs. His eyes bulged in pain. "I told you to let go of me!" She growled as he dropped to the ground in pain. **(Woo! No more kids for you, Nate! "What's that supposed to mean?" *coughs* Nuffin)**

"Ow…" Nathan managed to voice after the long squeak of pain. After a few more seconds, he started to get up, painfully mind you. **(That must have hurt… Oh well! *walks away.*)**

"Stay down, bitch!" Mag slapped his arm as she loomed over him. **(Go Mag, show your dominance over him! He's not the only tough one. "He was never tough. I mean, have you seen him?" *snorts* Yup)** "So, how've you been?" Mag asked, walking away from the man crumpled in pain on the floor.

"How am I doing?" He glared up at the singer. "You kick me in the nuts and ask how I'm doing?"

"Yeah," Mag admitted with haste.

"Pretty well, actually," He nodded his head, looking up at her. **(You better be *eyes suspiciously*)**

"Good, good," She nodded her head. "How's your nuts?"

"They hurt…" He bit his lip, trying to feign a smile. **(Grape juice!)**

"When's the coffee supposed to be done?" Mag traveled forward, stopping to stand in from of the man. "I want some coffee, _now._"

"Mag, these things take time." Nathan pried himself off the floor, wincing when he took a step forward. "It can't just magically be done." **(When I'm writing, sure it can! If Mag wants her coffee I'll make it be magically done for you, Maggie. :D "Fankoo! XD" "I hate you all." This is why people don't like you, Nathan, you're too hateful. -_-)**

"Coffee bells are ringing! Let's go!" Mag jumped for joy before hopping down the hallway. **(Like a little bunny =( 'o')= haha, ugly bunny.)**

"Mag! Mag! Mag! Hold on a second!" The man limped after Mag as she continued to scurry down the hallway to her precious coffee.

"What the hell do you want?" She growled, coming to a sudden halt. He ran into her, unable to slow himself down. **(Pay attention, clumsy pants!)**

"Nothing!" Nathan stood up straight, his eyes wide in fear.

Growling, Mag swung back around and continued her way to the kitchen. As she reached the kitchen, she stopped and sniffed the air. "That's the best smell ever." **(Concurrence.)** She looked giddily around in search for her giant coffee mug. Traveling over to the cabinet, she stopped short when she felt something touch her arm. "Nathan…?"

"What?" He was standing behind her, rolling his eyes.

"Did you just touch me?" **(I know you weren't complaining earlier…)**

"No…" Nathan shook his head.

Mag looked down to her arm to see something black that was crawling. Freaking out, she batted the bug off of her arm, jumping several feet while screaming. "It was on me! Oh my god it was on me!" She let out terrified squeaks as it crawled on the floor towards her direction. "Kill it!" **(Ugh…. Bugs are disgusting… I'm getting jumpy just thinking about them…)**

"It's a small insect for God's sake, Mag." Nathan scoffed as he squashed it with his shoe.

"It was on me…" She still stay stunned, staring at her arm. "It was on me thinking it could use my arm as some sort of bug highway…" Moving her head slightly to look at Nathan, she felt something else on her arm. "Ah," She exclaimed, desperately shaking about, trying to get whatever it was off.

"Mag, calm down, it's your hair!" He chuckled, moving it out of the way. **(Drawback of having long hair. Get confused with bugs after you have just been mauled by one. "I know!" Luv you for not saying IKR!)**

"You can never be sure when those little fuckers are around." Mag growled. **(Language, Mag, language! "Oh, fuck off." *grabs soap* Don't make me use this. "*hides in corner*" Yeah, I thought so…-_-)**

"Coffee time?" Nathan tried to get her mind off of the insects.

"I can't… too many bugs… they're all over. They'll get me!" She squealed when she saw something on the counter. She jumped and hid behind Nathan. **(Yes, hide behind the chicken.)**

"It was one bug and those are coffee grounds." He shook her off of him, leading his way towards the coffee pot. **(Hahaha…. "*glares*" *coughs* I mean, sad… so sad… he doesn't understand your pain)**

"I can't… they're so hideous. I want to get out of here. We should go somewhere." Mag smiled at him, her grip not loosening.

"Release… your nails are breaking flesh!" Nathan tried to pry her hand away. **(But… it's fun to watch someone bleed. Amiright Mag? "YUS!")**

"I can't be here with all of those bugs." She continued, digging her nails deeper into his skin.

"There was _one_ bug, Mag. And there are more outside, smart one." He growled, shaking his arm.

"Oh," She looked away for a moment. "Will you kill them for me, the ones in the house?" Mag stared at him, innocently waiting for an answer.

"You're so annoying! I wasn't going to do this… but I've made up my mind." Taking his finger, her prodded her again. "Boop."

"What the hell?" She released him, taking a few paces back. **(Boop? I- wha- uh… wh-what are you supposed to be doing, there, Nathan? "I felt it was quite necessary.") **Mag shook her head, holding the area he touched. "Great, now I have to burn my clothes. I love this cloak."

"No you don't, I washed my hands this time." He reassured, setting his hands on his hips. **(This time? What about the other times? I would very much like to know! "As do I…")**

"Whatever…" Mag sighed, looking down to the floor. "You'll wash it, won't you?"

"Fine!" Nathan rolled his eyes.

"Guess what the fucking cat dragged in?" A very familiar voice sounded from behind Mag. Quickly turning around, she found it to be Luigi. **(We're getting all of the special guest appearances aren't we? "Don't forget me!" Oh-oh god… I suppose I have to include **_**Amber Sweet**_** in this…. "No you don't :)" Thanks, Mag, but if I'm completing my goal, I have to.)**

"What're you doing in here, Luigi?" Mag's astonished tone yelped in surprise.

"So my fucking brother and father can come, but I can't? That's fucking ridiculous!" He stomped his foot childishly. **(Oh please…. Not another Mag…)**

"I suppose you can come for a visit." Mag shrugged.

"So, you made coffee?" He eyed the fresh-brewed pot with angst. "I haven't had a good fucking cup forever and a day. My last assistant fucked it up because he's a fucking idiot that doesn't know how to fucking do shit. So I fucked him up, six feet under." **(I suppose that's all right to kill him. If he messed up a good cup of coffee, it's worth it. Anything's worth it for good coffee :D)**

"Touch my coffee once, ass wrinkle, and I'll rip something off!" Mag growled threateningly. **(Woah, Mag, calm down!)**

"Wait... ass wrinkle? What type of fucking insult is that?" Luigi chuckled as he stopped in his tracks. "You have no fucking mind."

"She's insane." Nathan commented under his breath. **(We know that, but you love her. **_**"We **_**love her. *looks at sternly*" Okay, okay...**_**)**_

"Luigi..." Mag warned, taking a step forward. "Don't touch my coffee."

"I'm sure you can fucking share one fucking cup, Mag." Luigi scoffed, taking a coffee cup that sat next to the pot. As he started to pour the hot, brown liquid into the porcelain cup, Mag closed in on him.

She growled, holding a kitchen knife up to his neck. Pinning him against the counter and her body, she bared her teeth. "I told you not to touch my coffee." **(At least she gave you fair warning. Last time I touched her coffee, she nearly ripped my hair out of my head while pulling me back from it. :/)**

"Let go of me you fucking mad woman!" He near-panicked, trying to grip Mag's wrist.

"Get out of my house and leave my coffee alone. You don't mess with the coffee." She stepped away from him, allowing Luigi to run out of the house in pure terror. **(Wow... you even made the toughest Largo run out, tail-between-legs. You are number one, I can officially say it now.)**

Nathan stare at the woman who was now grinning as she filled the cup full. "Darling, are you all right?" **(Nope.)**

"Why might you ask?" She looked at him, an innocent smile upon her face as she sipped at her coffee. "I got my coffee, I'm perfectly fine."

"Well, that's good, I suppose." Shaking his head, Nathan traveled up to stand next to her. "So, cutie, what's next?"

"What do you mean, what's next? I got what I wanted, we're done here." Mag shook her head like he was crazy and walked out of the kitchen. **(I think that completes her day...)**

"Whatever," Nathan sighed, grabbing a cookie from the jar. **(Random cookie! At least it's not from your Ass of Holding this time.)** "Mag! I'm coming with a cookie!"

…...

**I suppose that concludes our adventures for this chapter. I hope you liked it and am terribly sorry that this took so long to get to you. But I hope it was well worth the wait. Please, review and tell me what you think. I'm free to any hilarious suggestions to add into the next chapter. Until then, good day!**


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